6 Questions to Ask Aging Parents About Their Finances

Other important estate planning documents include a medical or health care power of attorney, a financial power of attorney, a living trust and an advance health care directive. “If they do have these documents, then how long ago were they updated?” Margolis suggests asking. “If they don’t have them, then you can meet with an estate planner to put them in place.”

‘What bills do you manage each month?’

Pinsker says this is one of the most important questions for children to ask aging parents. “I’ve seen this happen in families, where adult children have no idea how their parents have been living,” she says. “Racking up credit card debt, or holiday presents all going on credit cards ... That can cause trouble down the road, so look for little clues, like past-due notices in the mail or lots of bills on their desk.”

Many older adults have debt, such as mortgages, auto loans and credit card balances. Finding out what your parents owe can help you gain a complete picture of their finances.

“If you’re concerned about their cognitive decline, you really should know whether they’re running a monthly deficit or saving anything,” Pinsker says.

‘Have you ever been contacted by a stranger asking for money or personal information?’

Older adults are a common target for scammers, who are becoming increasingly sophisticated at separating people from their money. A 2026 AARP report found that an estimated 41 percent of Americans age 50 and older have had money stolen due to fraud or sensitive information obtained and used fraudulently.

One way to help protect your parents from financial abuse is to ask them to add you as a joint owner on their bank accounts. That way, you can help monitor their transaction history for suspicious charges. “That doesn’t take away their ability to manage their own finances, but it does keep extra eyes on that money,” Margolis says.

If they don’t feel comfortable adding you as a joint owner, ask them to make you a “trusted contact person,” which authorizes their bank to contact you if it suspects their account has been compromised or they are being financially exploited.

‘What are the usernames and passwords for your financial accounts?’

These days, many people manage their checking accounts, stock portfolios and other assets online. But if something happens to an aging parent and you don’t have their login information, you could be locked out of their accounts, and it could take you “weeks, if not months, untangling the basics during a crisis,” says Scott Van Den Berg, a financial planner with Century Management in Austin, Texas.

If your parents don’t feel comfortable sharing their login information directly, ask them where their usernames and passwords are stored in the event you need them.

‘What are you most concerned about financially as you get older?’

You might have your own idea of what money issues are troubling your parents, but you can’t truly know what their biggest worries are unless you ask them.

Perhaps the thing keeping them up at night is the prospect of paying for long-term care, or becoming a financial burden on you, or just everyday inflation eroding their retirement savings. Once you’ve identified your parents’ top money concerns, you can help them develop strategies to address them.

‘Where would you like to live in your later years?’

If they don’t know the answer, try asking a more pointed question, suggests Desiree Fisher, a financial planner in New York City specializing in elder care and estate planning. For instance: “Do you plan to stay in your home, or move to a senior living community?”

According to a recent AARP survey, 3 in 4 Americans age 50-plus would like to live in their home for as long as possible. If your parents are among them, it may be time to talk about making some home improvements to help them age in place, such as installing grab bars in showers, adding stairwell lighting to help prevent falls or widening doorways to allow more space for mobility devices.