Looking for Your New Bestie? Discover Local Ethel Gathering Groups

Today, nearly 66,000 Ethels in 48 states host potlucks, hikes, restaurant meetups, volunteer outings, group trips and cultural events for women in their areas. ​

But ask any of these Ethels, and they’ll tell you: The groups are not just about candle-making workshops, trivia nights or bring-your-own-soup-and-toppings bars, although they're certainly part of the fun. The important part is creating a supportive environment for women to share personal experiences and develop real friendships in this new stage of life. ​

Often, discussions aren’t even about aging. Women said they simply appreciate having a space for routine coffee‑table conversations with other girlfriends. ​

And when they do talk about getting older, members said the topic feels approachable because everyone in the room is navigating similar terrain. ​

“If I don’t want to talk about what [medical] test I just had or what worry I’m having, I don’t feel like I have to,” says Aimée Bradley, 66, a Port Angeles, Washington, resident and fellow Ethel who leads discussion groups at a nearby library on various topics like self-care, coping with stress or communication styles. “Because everybody is going through that, and it normalizes stuff that you might have some fear or dread about.” ​

Members often rally around one of their own in need, like Rossi’s group. Surgery or illness often prompt homemade meal drop-offs or hospital visits. ​

That’s exactly who Ethels are, says Barb Thibert, who’s been informally dubbed the “engine and the heart” of the Olympic Peninsula-Kitsap Ethel chapter by some of its members. ​

Barb Thibert, 54, started the Olympic Peninsula and Kitsap Ethel Gathering Group nearly two years ago after finding herself on a quest for friendship. Since its inception, the group has hosted more 1,000 events and drawn more than 1,600 members.

Chona Kasinger

When Thibert, 54, moved to the area with her husband nearly three years ago, she wanted to put down roots in what would become their long-term community.​

To find friends, she joined a local Bunco group but found connection lacking.​

“After a year, people still didn't know each other's names,” she says. “It was like nobody really wanted to get to know each other. They wanted to roll dice for an hour and a half, and then they wanted to go home.” ​

Undeterred, Thibert discovered The Ethel Facebook community. She saw it as an opportunity to put her computer skills to use and bring others into her quest for friendship. ​

Nearly two years later, the group has become one of the largest in the country, hosting more than 1,000 events for its 1,600 members since its inception. ​

Thibert says the group has become a springboard for authentic friendships, and more members have volunteered to become event hosts, not just attendees.​

Social connection matters more than ever

Rossi says before finding the Ethels, she felt isolated. ​

Her social circle shrunk when her two of her closest friends died, one moved away and the last moved into a nursing home.​

“I started being a couch potato,” she says. “I just sat at home all the time, didn’t go anywhere.” ​

A 2024 survey of Ethel Facebook community members by AARP found that more than 6 in 10 said they often or sometimes felt a lack of companionship or felt isolated from others. Eighty-four percent said they found it increasingly difficult to make friends as they age.​

Nationwide trends also reflect these feelings more generally: Forty percent of U.S. adults report being lonely, according to a December AARP study. ​

But the data also shows Ethel groups are an effective antidote to that isolation. ​

Another local Ethel member enjoying dessert and good company on a group outing.

Chona Kasinger

Nearly two-thirds of women who joined one of the private AARP Ethel groups have met up with members in their area, according to the AARP survey. Almost half said their local Ethel Gathering Groups program brought them real-life, in-person friendships.​

Those friendships aren’t just a feel-good story; strong social bonds can help slow aging and reduce the risk of heart disease, memory loss, anxiety and depression.​

The U.S. Surgeon General’s 2023 advisory on social connection even suggests that chronic isolation can increase the risk of premature death when other aspects of well‑being are diminished. ​

It’s not always easy to take that first step toward meeting new people. Thibert says sometimes all it takes is a sincere invitation to help women find the courage to walk through the door. ​

“Showing up is easy for outgoing, gregarious people, but it’s not easy for people who aren’t,” says Thibert. “I felt a sense of responsibility … to make this an amazing experience for the women who really put themselves out there.”