How Social Connections Help You Live Longer

Navigating a caregiving journey? Ask AARP, our AI-powered assistant, can help you find answers, resources, and guidance.

Content starts here

Cori Vanchieri,

AARP

En español

Published May 01, 2026

Ken Stern, founder and chair of the Longevity Project, took a Ponce de León trip around the world in search of today’s fountain of youth. Countries with lots of healthy, older adults — Singapore, Japan, South Korea, Spain, Italy — all had one thing in common. And it wasn’t exercise or diet.

Instead, each of these countries make the social health of their older citizens central to public health; they invest in the infrastructure of social health so that people after age 50 or 60 or 70 stay connected and able to find purpose, meaning and joy in life.

More Ways to Benefit

View All

Related Benefit 1
Related Benefit 2
Related Benefit 3
Related Benefit 4
Related Benefit 5

He says the United States would be wise to do the same. In the 1970s and early ’80s, our longevity was right up there with other countries with advanced economies. But around the 1980s, “we started pulling apart and getting lonelier,” Stern said. Unions, religious organizations, sewing circles, PTAs and Elks clubs have been in a long-term decline, as Robert Putnam wrote about in his 2000 book, Bowling Alone.

Today, “We’re now by far the shortest lived among the advanced economies of the world,” he says. The other countries have the same technology challenges we do; their subways are full of people head down in their phones too, but they manage to stay social. How?

In a nutshell, they encourage people to stay productively engaged through work or volunteering — with flexibility — into their older years, invest in lifelong learning for their citizens and encourage intergenerational living rather than age-segregated communities. All in an effort to keep older adults connected with others. Stern described his findings, from his 2025 book Healthy to 100: How Strong Social Ties Lead to Long Lives, to Claire Casey, AARP Foundation president, on April 8, during National Volunteer Month.

“We spend so much of our time, our money, our attention ... on our physical health, but actually connection matters as much or more,” Casey said.

Volunteering gives back to the volunteer

The longest-running study in U.S. history on adult happiness supports the idea that social connections are key. The Harvard Study of Adult Development launched in the 1930s to understand the keys to happiness and health. The study’s current director, Robert Waldinger, defines the good life as “being engaged in activities I care about with people I care about.”

Casey, who also volunteers with AARP’s Tax-Aide program, said that quote speaks to “the power of being in a community of volunteers.

Most Popular

“Volunteerism really is the heart and soul of not just AARP Foundation, but all of AARP,” she continued. “We have over 60,000 volunteers nationwide, and it is what makes our work possible.”

Casey described AARP’s Tax-Aide program, which offers free tax assistance by volunteers, and Experience Corps, a tutoring program that brings older volunteers into schools to tutor children in K-3rd grade.

Studies of Experience Corps volunteers have found that over a year of volunteering 15 hours a week, several health measures improved for the volunteers; “not because they were eating or exercising differently, but because they were involved in a program that gave them meaning, purpose and social connection,” Stern said.

Good news: It’s not about personality

And you don’t have to be an extrovert to make friends. “Social connection is largely a function, not of personality, but of proximity,” Stern said. “We get most of our social connections from school and work.”

Research shows that 90 hours of proximity make a friend; 200 hours make a close friend. “That’s why volunteering is so great, because people are next to other people of like-minded values,” he said.

He ends his book with this statement: “[O]ur collective future hinges upon our ability to reimagine ourselves as contributors, not takers — as part of the future, not a legacy of the past.” He also encourages small, starter interactions. He said writing this book has him reaching out to old friends he’s lost touch with. “It turns out to be an extraordinary thing to reconnect with people you cared about at one point and then time and distance took you apart.

“The world is full of lonely people waiting for other people to take the first step,” he said. “People love when you take the first step.”

Stern’s tips for healthy aging:

Learn in person – Learning is not something you try for a while, then stop. Virtual classes are a lifeline for people with mobility issues or who can’t leave their homes. But for those who can get out, in-person learning gets you in direct contact with all sorts of people — better for learning and for health. And lifelong learning is one of the six pillars of brain health.

Stay engaged through work or volunteering – Older people increasingly want to work or be productively engaged by volunteering. Stern notes that U.S. workers over age 75 are the fastest-growing part of the workforce. Work, even part-time, can help fill our needs for social connection, meaning and mobility — as well as help with finances.

Be flexible with work but be present – “Remote work is increasingly a part of our isolated, lonely lives, and is particularly hard on older workers,” he wrote. “Make sure there is a face-to-face component” in any work you choose. “Older workers value flexibility, learning new skills and interacting with other people.”

Choose intergenerational communities – When the generations fit together like pieces of a jigsaw puzzle, both the old and the young benefit, Stern said. But active aging retirement communities are now common in the United States. “Those places don’t tend to exist in other countries. It’s really an American idea.”

Volunteer – The more time you put in, the larger the health returns. “Treat volunteering as part of a larger portfolio of your next act. Make a plan, have goals and treat the next 20 years as seriously and meticulously as you did the last 20.” Choose an organization that suits you and set goals.

Follow the 5-3-1 rule, developed by Kasley Killam, who wrote the 2024 book, The Art and Science of Connection.

Spend time with five people each week
Nurture at least three close relationships
Aim for one hour of quality connection each day

AARP Membership

Join AARP for only $15 per year with automatic renewal. Get instant access to members-only products and hundreds of benefits, a free second membership, and a subscription to AARP The Magazine.

Join