12 Mistakes You Make at the Doctor’s Office

A physician’s advice for how to make your visit go well

Dr. Stanley Sack,

Updated October 29, 2025

AARP

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En español

Published December 08, 2023

/ Updated October 29, 2025

woman having her heartbeat checked at the doctor

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What is it like being a patient? That’s something I thought I would never need to ask myself. After all, to become a primary care pediatrician, I went through 11 years of schooling, plus a lifetime of continuing education.

But I felt woefully unprepared when I began making my own visits to the doctor’s office more often. I realized how difficult it is to be the one seeking care rather than the one giving it. In other words, being a patient is hard.

Writer and patient advocate Jackie Duda stresses the importance of a good interaction with your health care provider. “We, as patients, bear the onus of being able to communicate very clearly with our doctors,” she says. Good doctor-patient communication is not just about a feel-good moment; it can prevent mistakes. That’s just one compelling reason to make the most of our office visits. And knowing what not to do when you’re the patient is as important as knowing what to do.

6 Things to Take to Your Appointment

All insurance information
A list of questions
A list of your medications, vitamins and supplements
Date and type of your recent vaccinations
A summary of your visits with other health care providers
A friend, relative or other advocate

With that in mind, here are some mistakes to avoid when you’re visiting your doctor:

1. Overestimating your technical abilities

Patient portals are increasingly common; the University of Michigan’s 2023 “National Poll on Healthy Aging” report found that 3 in 4 adults ages 50 to 80 have used one. But that doesn’t mean they’re easy to use. Even a check-in tablet can pose problems for those of us who didn’t grow up with that particular technology. . "Get someone to help you," Duda says. Enlist the help of a trusted friend or family member or someone in your provider’s office for technical assistance.

2. Timing routine visits wrong

If you’re sick, you need to get medical attention right away. But if you’re scheduling a routine appointment, like a physical, consider the timing. For instance, if a Medicare representative suggests you learn what new medications you might need before you select a Part D plan for the year, you should probably schedule your physical before it’s time to choose that plan. Timing is also important when it comes to your health insurance deductibles. You may be better off booking these appointments at the end of the calendar year, after you’ve met your deductible.

3. Coming in unprepared to discuss your symptoms

It’s essential to do your prep before the office visit. “We wish that [patients] would come in prepared as much as I come in prepared to see them,” says Dr. Jonathan Appelbaum, an internist and professor emeritus at Florida State University College of Medicine. Dr. Michael Gloth, a geriatrician and faculty member at Florida State University College of Medicine, says to tell your doctor your symptoms first, instead of trying to tell them what you think you might have. Making a list of your symptoms is a great start. “Having it all written down ahead of time so that everybody’s on the same page is helpful,” Gloth says.

4. Keeping your doctor in the dark about seeing other providers

If you’ve seen other providers — a specialist or an urgent care physician — don’t assume your doctors will have that information. “Patients think we know everything — that we have all … right in front of us. That could not be further from the truth. We don’t know who they’ve seen, what they’ve seen them for and what was done,” Appelbaum says.

Insist on a summary, a diagnosis or list of possible diagnoses, and recommended treatment from any provider you see —and share that at your current appointment.

5. Hiding the truth

The doctor’s office should be a judgment-free zone, and providers have heard it all. Talking to them about your sexual or drug history, for example, is never off-limits and might be important for your health. Family stressors and domestic violence are other topics to discuss honestly. If you don’t, those white lies about how much alcohol you drink or how often you exercise can create problems, too. Overcoming embarrassment to have honest discussions with your doctor has many benefits: Doctors can more correctly interpret your symptoms and, when you need medication, prescribe you something that’s less likely to be harmful.

6. Not knowing your family medical history

We know a lot more than we used to about how diseases are inherited. It’s never been more important to know details about your family’s medical history so you can share them with your provider. Ask your family members — especially your parents, siblings and adult children — about any major or chronic illnesses they’ve had. If you have access to their health records, learn as much as you can about treatments they’ve received too.

7. Not bringing a list of your medications (including doses)

Drugs can interact with each other, and mix-ups do occur, especially as you get older and take more medications. More than 4 out of every 10 adults over 65 say they used five or more prescription drugs in the past month, according to a 2024 report published in JAMA. The Centers for Disease Control says adults 65 and older wind up in the emergency room for adverse drug events 600,000 every year in the United States, more than twice as often as younger people.

Remember that vitamins and supplements can interact with medications, so include any you take on your list to discuss with your doctor. “We don’t always know what you’re taking. Be your own health record,” Appelbaum says. If your doctor isn’t asking about your medications, “you need to say something,” Duda adds.

8. Seeing the doctor-patient relationship as a one-way street

Traditionally, conversations between doctors and patients have had a “because I said so” ring to them. That’s no longer true. These days, there is (ideally) more collaboration between the two parties. Your circumstances will largely dictate the best approach to caring for yourself. Realize that you have a say with your doctor, so communicate your wishes, concerns and problems.

9. Ignoring the cost of your care

Health care costs are high, so it’s important you get the most care for your money. Ask how much specific services will cost up front and what’s covered by insurance and what’s not. If you can’t afford something, let your provider know. There may be an alternative available.

10. Leaving without written instructions

Post-op instructions have been the norm for years. But today your doctor likely takes notes on a computer during your appointment, which means your medical records are immediately updated. So it should be easy to get a printed copy that includes a list of your medications, recommended treatments and other instructions. Make sure you have yours when you check out. If your doctor hasn’t offered them, ask for them.

11. Leaving without getting your questions answered

Nothing is more frustrating than leaving the office and realizing you forgot to discuss with your provider the one thing you really wanted to. Just like you should come prepared with a list of symptoms, you should also come with a list of questions or concerns you have — and bring them up early in the appointment.

“Many times, in an older population, it’s not just a single issue,” Gloth says. “There are many, many issues, and the challenge is to get all the information up front, rather than when they’re walking out the door.”

12. Not using the office staff’s expertise

Develop a good relationship with your provider’s team, and don’t hesitate to use them when needed. If your doctor has to move on to the next patient — or if something comes up while you’re at home and the provider’s not available — talk to their nurse, medical assistant or even the office manager. They may have handled something very similar with other patients and can help you as well.

Knowing how to communicate and work with your doctor isn’t easy, and it’s no surprise that we all (myself included) are prone to making mistakes in our interactions. If we strive to get better at avoiding the gaffes, that will go a long way to improving our encounters — and, it follows, our health outcomes.

Editor's note: This article, first published on Dec. 8, 2023, has been updated with new information.

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Dr. Stanley Sack spent 33 years practicing general pediatrics in Massachusetts and Florida. He works as a freelance writer and editor from his home in Key West, Florida. His articles have been featured in publications such as Keys Weekly and Rural Health Quarterly.