8 Life Lessons From Amanda Knox’s New Memoir, ‘Free’

2. Be kind.

Knox remembers her mother telling her as a child, “Of all the things I hope for you, Amanda — that you’re successful and smart — I hope most that you’ll be kind.” She took that message to heart. In prison, she helped other prisoners translate their court documents and letters, knowing that such acts of goodwill would keep her safe, “but it will also feel good…contributing something to the small, deprived society of the cellblock.”

3. Don’t succumb to righteousness.

Knox received gruesome death threats, including some that threatened her family. But what was almost worse, she writes, was the careless meanness directed her way on social media (comments such as “We know you did it” or just “Meredith”). Knox concluded that she would aim to be someone “who would try her damnedest not to get sucked into false beliefs and to forever be on guard against the lure of that righteous feeling.”

4. Try empathy.

After experiencing such relentless judgment, “radical empathy” became a way of life for her. “When well-intentioned people come up to me and say, ‘I can’t imagine what you’ve been through,’ I simply say, ‘Try,’” she writes. A stranger approached her a few years ago, sobbing, saying, “I’m so sorry. I’m sorry I treated you as entertainment.” Knox “hugged her for a long time.”

Knox speaks to the media during a brief press conference in front of her parent’s home in 2015, after she was acquitted for the second time, with friends and family in the background.

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5. Embrace joy.

Christopher helped her rediscover joy and play. They went to Burning Man, where she relished her anonymity in her dust mask and goggles and frolicked amid the weirdness. That was one big step in her efforts to relinquish fear — which was crucial, she writes, because “Fear, especially fear of judgment, is poison for play. Play is a wiggly hand, not a clenched fist.” The couple decided that their February 29, 2020, wedding would be time travel-themed and full of silliness. They built wacky clocks to adorn the walls, and guests wore wild costumes.

6. Have a purpose.

In 2014, she attended an Innocence Network Conference gathering in Portland, where representatives from Innocent Projects around the country convened. She was surrounded by others unjustly accused, and the community embraced her. Realizing that “my trauma was not unique,” she’d finally found people who understood her experience, and decided to make it her mission to speak out for others who’d been wronged by the criminal justice system. She’s become a vocal advocate for reform.

7. Let go of what doesn’t serve you.

Knox became obsessed with getting the main prosecutor, Giuliano Mignini, “the man who’d imprisoned me,” to understand that she was innocent. She sent him a letter inviting him to meet her face to face, hoping that he “can come to see that I am not a monster, but that I am simply Amanda.” He initially refused but did respond, and they began exchanging letters and emails — about the trial, their lives, his cats. He seemed to grow genuinely fond of her (in one email, he signed off, “A hug, Giuliano”). But, to her bafflement and frustration, he seemed incapable of acknowledging that he and the Italian justice system had made a catastrophic mistake, only admitting, “I could have been wrong.” She eventually decided she would stop her emotional investment in whether this one man apologized to her or not. It took her a while, but she claims to have done so.

The house in Perugia where Knox and her roommate, Meredith Kercher, lived in 2007, before the murder.

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8. Forgive.

In 2022, Mignini finally agreed to a meeting with Knox in Italy. The meeting was carefully planned and kept secret, and Knox, nearly sick with anxiety, flew to Italy with her mom, Chris, and Eureka. After they politely greeted each other, Knox looked into his eyes and tearfully read a prepared statement that began with “I want you to know that I am innocent… You were wrong about me” and ended with “I wish you peace.” Then they discussed the case — the exchange grew heated — but she came away mostly satisfied, again trying her darndest not to dwell on the fact that he still hadn’t admitted wrongdoing. “True compassion, true mercy must be extended to everyone — even, and perhaps especially, to the people who have hurt us,” she concludes. “Only then can we be free.”