How to Help Cope With Touch Deprivation

Key takeaways

• Improve mental and physical health by prioritizing regular touch, says sex therapist Sari Cooper.
• Fight loneliness with simple acts: Join group activities, book massages or care for a pet.
• Find comfort in weighted blankets or hugging a pillow when traditional touch isn’t available.

Summary

Touch deprivation, often referred to as “skin hunger,” can deeply affect emotional and physical well-being, especially for older adults. Sex therapist Sari Cooper highlights that regular physical touch supports everything from lower stress levels to better sleep and a stronger immune system. If you’re coping with touch deprivation, practical steps like joining group activities, booking a massage or caring for a pet can make a real difference in fighting loneliness and boosting your mood.

Sari Cooper also notes that simple solutions — such as wrapping up in a weighted blanket or hugging a pillow — can offer comfort when traditional sources of touch aren’t available. Whether it’s connecting with others through dance, adopting a pet or trying a Swedish massage, finding ways to meet your touch needs is vital for nurturing both mind and body as you age. Prioritizing physical connection, in any form, is an important part of maintaining emotional and physical health.

The key takeaways and summary were created with the assistance of generative AI. An AARP editor reviewed and refined the content for accuracy and clarity.

Full Transcript:

[00:00:00] Physical touch is an essential form of human connection. As we age, everyday opportunities for touch often decrease.

[00:00:08] Maybe you’re living alone, lost a partner, or you just don’t see family and friends as much anymore.

[00:00:15] When touch is missing, something called skin hunger or touch deprivation can occur.

[00:00:22] This doesn’t just cause feelings of loneliness or disconnection. Over time, it can also raise stress hormones,

[00:00:29] weaken your immune system, bump up blood pressure, and even disrupt your sleep.

[00:00:34] So what do you do when you don’t have friends or family around to give you a hug or put an arm around you?

[00:00:41] The good news is there are options. Consider joining a group activity like partnered yoga or any kind

[00:00:48] of social dance, like swing or square dancing, or even salsa. These experiences offer safe, nonsexual physical contact, while also helping

[00:01:00] you stay active and socially connected. If you have mobility issues or group activities just aren’t for you, a

[00:01:07] different approach is to book a massage. A Swedish massage is a therapeutic technique that involves

[00:01:13] gentle strokes and kneading. They’re perfect for a soothing professional touch.

[00:01:19] A manicure or pedicure could even work, because they often include a massage. Another option:

[00:01:25] Consider adopting a pet or becoming a foster fur parent.  Dogs and cats can make great cuddle partners and

[00:01:33] housemates. For older adults, pets have benefits beyond a physical presence. They can ease loneliness, lower stress, and give you a

[00:01:41] reason to move more every day. Finally, wrapping yourself in soft, cozy textures like plush fabrics can help

[00:01:50] if you’re craving some touch. Try things like using a weighted blanket, hugging a pillow or wearing compression clothing.

[00:01:58] Remember, touch is a basic human need. Seeking it out isn’t a weakness. It’s a way to nurture your emotions, your mind and body.

[00:02:08] Give yourself permission to find that connection. For more content like this, visit AARP.org/InTheMood.