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4 Things I Do Now That I Never Thought I’d Do When I Was Younger

It all started with small changes to my lifestyle


a woman dreamily thinking about her past
Monica Garwood

Welcome to Ethels Tell All, where the writers behind The Ethel newsletter share their personal stories related to the joys and challenges of aging. Come back each Wednesday for the latest piece, exclusively on AARP Members Edition.

During a recent stay at an RV park, I was chatting with an older man from the lot next to mine, admiring the golf cart he’d unhooked from his trailer. He laughed and said the vehicle was an “age-transitional” thing; he’d traded his Harley-Davidson Sportster for the four-seater golf cart.

A memory from 40 years ago flashed through my mind: of riding on the back of my boyfriend’s motorcycle as we zigzagged through traffic on I-95. I shuddered at the thought. Who was that girl? In my early 20s, I never worried about my mortality; I lived a life of spontaneity to keep boredom at bay, even if it meant being reckless.

I had no plans of ever slowing down, but with aging came wisdom and plenty of “what the heck was I thinking” moments that changed how I wanted to live during my second act.

There are still glimpses of that spontaneous daredevil girl inside me, and I like to think I’m still young at heart at 65. But I’ve changed in many ways, doing things I never imagined I’d be doing when I was younger.

It started with small changes: switching from MTV to HGTV, swapping out my leather wristlets for bright tote bags large enough to carry everything in my refrigerator, and going to bed at 9 p.m. instead of going to bars.

And that was just the beginning.

1. Changing travel plans

Vacations are very different today than when I was in my 30s, where I’d jump at the chance to leave on an hour’s notice for a weekend at the beach. Back then, I’d throw shorts, T-shirts, a bathing suit and flip-flops into a small bag and hit the road.

Now, I need at least a week to plan a three-day road trip. My suitcase is usually bulging with 10 different outfits: a sweater (even when it’s 85 degrees out because God knows, you can’t trust the weather), enough underwear to last a month, and a separate bag for the medicine cabinet I pack (you never know when you might need anti-itch creams, aspirin, bunion correctors, a heating pad, earplugs, heartburn meds, fiber pills, a knee pad, extra floss or sleep aids). As a young mother, I planned busy itineraries with entire days at amusement parks for the thrill of roller coaster rides and overpriced hot dogs. Today, I prefer playing cards in a quiet campground where the only sound is the breeze whistling through the trees under a canopy of stars.

Even the routes I travel are different from my past road trips. I never minded long drives through deserted areas where radio signals were nonexistent. Now I select routes based on the number of available bathroom breaks because I have a fickle bladder. For this reason, I keep an emergency backup in my car — a portable urinal. Yeah, 20-something me wouldn’t have been caught dead with a pee jar in my car.

2. Fashion changes

My taste in fashion has also changed as I’ve gotten older; I dress for comfort rather than style. Younger me wouldn’t have stepped foot in a department store with animal-print tunics or jeggings. Proof of this lies in the bowels of my closet, where there’s a rainbow-sequined tube top and orange satin pants I wore for late nights at the disco. Yes, I was once a trending fashionista, and proud of it. 

But today, I've traded four-inch heels for flats with arch support. Also gone are my skinny jeans, in favor of stretchy pants with built-in control-top panels. And Mom was right — going braless in my early 20s was a big mistake. Today, I rely on a few moth-eaten bras that promise the impossible task of lifting my sagging breasts.

3. Cheaper forms of entertainment

It doesn’t take much to entertain me these days. Weekend afternoons are no longer spent at outdoor concerts or rowdy beer festivals, where I usually ended up tipsy and sunburned. Instead, I enjoy exploring nature and identifying the different species of birds that inhabit my backyard. I recently spent an entire afternoon watching a squirrel build a nest, and the level of excitement I experienced rivaled the thrill I felt after scoring tickets to a B-52’s concert in the 1980s. The younger me never took the time to soak in nature, let alone Google the mating and pregnancy cycle of squirrels. Now I do.

4. New hobbies

When I was fresh out of college, my hobbies included dancing, karaoke singing and tanning poolside with my girlfriends while we flipped through glossy celeb magazines.

Today, I’m drawn to gardening and learning new tips to keep my flowerbeds healthy. I’m not sure how I went from collecting vinyl records to seed packets, but the plant app on my phone tells me I’m doing a stellar job at selecting the proper flora for my climate zone.

Shopping was also a favorite weekend hobby when I was young. I couldn’t resist spending my paycheck on expensive perfumes or high-end cosmetics. It took much more back then to boost my confidence, and even if it meant blowing my monthly budget on serums made from goat intestines, I was all in. Today, I’m more frugal with my cash, and most of my shopping involves an inordinate amount of time studying light fixtures and faucets at the hardware store.

There have been other changes I never imagined for myself when I was younger: my obsession with WebMD the minute I’m hit with a bout of indigestion, or how easy it is to pull a muscle while sneezing. Nor would I have tolerated the extra 10-pound food baby resting comfortably around my waistline.

I’ve also turned into a habitual napper, something 30-year-old me once considered slothful. But sloths know the importance of conserving energy to thrive in their habitat, so I’m sticking with that.

The most significant change over the last 40 years is my mindset about the future. Younger me took my health and relationships for granted. However, the slow progression of losing loved ones has sharpened my appreciation for life. It’s a humbling experience, and I wake every morning feeling refreshed with gratitude, something that was missing from my youth. Nowadays, I prefer routine over risk and taking each day at a slower pace, even if it means trading in my sporty little car for a golf cart.

AARP essays share a point of view in the author’s voice, drawn from expertise or experience, and do not necessarily reflect the views of AARP.

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