What’s Expected When I Get a Graduation Announcement?

Our etiquette expert shares the proper response to end-of-school-year notices, whether with a gift, card or nothing at all

Lizzie Post,

AARP

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Published April 10, 2026

a person opens an envelope containing a graduation announcement with a flurry of falling graduation hats in the background

As graduation season approaches, you may find a flurry of announcements landing in your mailbox or inbox.

Jon Krause

Written, mailed announcements are a classic etiquette tradition and a great way to spread news more intimately than on social media. But I often get questions about how exactly to respond to such an announcement. As we enter graduation season, this reader asks an especially timely question.

I often get announcements from relatives and friends about their child or grandchild graduating from high school or college, but I sometimes don’t know the child in question at all. Is it OK to just send congratulations? Or should I send a gift or gift card with that, and if so, what amount is appropriate? —Submitted by A.M.

Thank you so much for the question! This is a great one, and the answer can apply to birth and marriage announcements as well. The good news is that your role, when you receive an announcement, is very simple: Read it. Technically, that’s it!

An announcement is just that: an announcement. It is not an invitation or something that requires a gift or even acknowledgment. It’s simply a lovely tradition that allows the person celebrating the accomplishment or milestone to share the news with those in their inner or extended circle.

In instances where you don’t even know the person who is graduating, you don’t have to respond at all. But when you do know the person, sending a card — or a text, phone call or video call — is absolutely an option, and any form of call allows the other person to hear your joy for them.

For a card, you might write, “Dear Anisha, Congratulations on graduating high school! I’m so impressed with your accomplishments, and it was wonderful to read that you’ve been on the honor roll and a member of the karate team for the last four years! I hope you are very proud of yourself and that you get to take some time to enjoy all you’ve accomplished. All my love, Auntie Leigh.”

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Or, for someone with whom you text often, you might send a picture of the announcement and the above note, just in text form, without the salutation or sign-off.

More Modern Manners

If an announcement inspires you to send a gift to the person being celebrated, that is great, but please feel no pressure to do so, especially for announcements regarding people you’ve never met (like a friend’s grandchild). There is no obligation or expectation to send a gift. If an announcement has maybe missed the etiquette mark and suggested that a gift would be welcome (by, for example, adding a Venmo username), you can politely ignore the suggestion if a gift doesn’t fit your situation.

Now, for those times when you are close to the person and would like to send a gift, you might send flowers, or something related to the school they are going to or the field they will be working in. The amount you spend depends entirely on your budget and what you feel comfortable spending. There is no etiquette that dictates a specific amount or item for a congratulatory gift. You can also always call the graduate’s parent to ask what might be appreciated.

It can be easy, in our ever-responsive world, to feel like you’re not doing enough by simply reading an announcement and thinking good thoughts for the person being celebrated. But it is perfectly polite. Anything more is wonderful when it feels right to you.

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Lizzie Post is the great-great-granddaughter of etiquette legend Emily Post. She’s the co-president of The Emily Post Institute, co-author of Emily Post’s Etiquette: the Centennial Edition and Emily Post's Business Etiquette. She is co-host of the Awesome Etiquette podcast.

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