AARP Hearing Center
You can’t go back to your grandmother’s Sunday suppers. But the pot roast recipe she improvised? The exact way your great-uncle folded dumplings? Those don’t have to vanish with time — not if you gather those details in one place.
“A family cookbook is a time machine,” says chef and TV host Pati Jinich, author of the workbook How to Write a Cookbook. “It’s a way to cook alongside people who are no longer here, to feed future grandchildren the same food that fed you. It connects us across generations through nourishment and love.”
But those memories won’t last on their own. Here’s how to preserve them before it’s too late.
Start with your favorites
Begin with five family dishes you love. Include the ones you actually make, plus any treasured handwritten cards from parents, grandparents or other relatives.
“Just make a list of recipe names — dishes that bring back memories, that you’d be heartbroken to lose,” Jinich says. If you’d like input from other family members, ask them to send any stories they remember about the dish and set a deadline. That list becomes your roadmap, says Jinich.
The “pinch of this” cure
Your Aunt Hannah cooked by taste, feel and decades of muscle memory. But how do you translate her “glug of oil” or “knob of butter”?
If your family cook is still around, join them in the kitchen. Bring measuring spoons. When they add “a splash,” you measure it. “Take notes on timing, sounds, smells,” Jinich says, “and record them talking — not just about the recipe but about who taught them and when they made it. Those stories are as precious as the recipes.”
If they’ve passed, talk to family members who watched them cook and compare notes.
Mine your own memories
Look for old photographs of holiday tables or birthday dinners — sometimes you can spot dishes you’ve forgotten. Searching online for similar recipes can help, too. “And don’t be afraid to experiment in your kitchen, re-creating what you remember. It might not be exactly what the original chef created, but it will carry their essence,” says Jinich.
If a recipe feels incomplete, Jinich recommends using it as a starting point. Test it in the kitchen and fill in any gaps along the way. “Call a cousin who might remember the missing details. This detective work is part of the process and often leads to wonderful conversations and discoveries,” she says.
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