I’m Proud to Be a Cat Lady

Welcome to Ethels Tell All, where the writers behind The Ethel newsletter share their personal stories related to the joys and challenges of aging. Come back Wednesday each week for the latest piece, exclusively on AARP Members Edition.

I became a mother at 50 — a foster mother, that is. A caregiver for two abandoned kittens I took in somewhat reluctantly at the nudge of a friend. I didn’t want to be a mother of cats. I was single, living in a studio apartment. I needed my freedom. But when I met the dynamic duo, one gray with white socks and one black with emerald eyes, things changed. I simply fell in love. Foster fail.

The problem was that unlike my friends who incessantly brag about their children or pooches, whenever I brought up the cute antics of my pair, I was quickly referred to as a “crazy cat lady.” Was it really so crazy to want to share stories of my fur babies? Was it still such a stigma to have cats?

It’s time to ditch this outdated stereotype. In fact, cat ownership is more common than dog ownership, according to a 2024 global survey by Mars Pet Nutrition. Of those surveyed, more men than women owned cats (52 percent male versus 48 percent female). Celebrities such as Ed Sheeran and Anthony Hopkins are often seen with pictures of their cats, leading the way as proud cat dads.

Ethels Tell All

Writers behind The Ethel newsletter aimed at women 55+ share their personal stories related to the joys and challenges of aging.

Read the full essays and join the conversation

Cat owners are not lonely spinsters but rather a social, healthy group of people that includes the likes of Taylor Swift, millennial men and anyone who wants to improve their mood. A 2020 study outlined the health benefits that cats can offer, from relationship-building to decreasing the risk of heart disease.

I realized that as life became more stressful, my cats became the one thing I could count on. When I come home after a long day of work, they crawl out of their hiding places and greet me at the door, a habit traditionally associated with dogs. I grab them one at a time and hug them. With this embrace I can hear them purr, and a gentleness comes over me. Suddenly the stressors of my day dissipate, and I am left calm. At peace. Sometimes I even leave and come back a few minutes later just to have the phenomenon happen again. Cats are lousy at telling time.