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Melanie Griffith's Point of View

The actress talks about life with husband Antonio Banderas

spinner image Melanie Griffith and Antonio Banderas
Melanie Griffith and Antonio Banderas.
Photo by AP

 Q: What first attracted you to Antonio?

A: Everything, really. His way. He's very funny. The first thing he asked me was my age. I said, "That's the rudest thing anyone has asked me first." But there was something about him. Still is. I just love him.

Q: Is it hard to be married to a sex symbol?

A: No — not any harder than being married to any man.

Q: How do you keep your marriage going?

A: We're willing to change with each other, let old things die and new things be born. But it's a constant endeavor.

Q: How is Antonio as a dad?

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A: If the kids need him, he's there. But he has a different parenting style. He can talk to them deeply about things they won't talk to me about, because I'm the one saying, "You're supposed to be doing this right now. It's your responsibility." I'm the disciplinarian; he's the understanding, philosophical one. We balance each other.

Q: Antonio and I talked about the recent news of men being unfaithful. What do you think of these guys?

A: I would feel so hurt. I don't know if humans were meant to be with only one person. I don't think so. But I don't believe Antonio could tolerate my being with someone else, just as I couldn't tolerate his being with someone else.

Q: He said that you all participated in your rehab a few years ago, and it welded you.

A: I'm sorry to say, that's in his mind. I started on pain pills when I hurt my knee skiing and just kept taking them. The kids knew; Dakota and Stella called me on it. Antonio was in London at the time. I went away to rehab for three months; it took 10 days just to detox. We had two family weeks there, but we didn't follow through. Antonio was supportive to the extent that he can be, but if you're not an alcoholic or drug addict, and you find out that your wife is a bad one, it's hard to deal with. As long as I'm okay, he's okay. I wish he would go to a meeting with me or to Al-Anon, but it's very foreign to him. Addiction runs in my family but not in his.

Q: So it's been your journey alone.

A: Yes. And I don't mean that against him. I would like him to do more, but it's a difficult thing to have happen in any family, and in that way he has been totally by my side. He really is the greatest guy.

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