LGBTQ Veteran Gets Closure at Vietnam Memorial Through Wish of a Lifetime

‘I’ve been wanting to come to Washington, D.C., for 50 years or more,’ says Billy Fiorelli

Dru Strand,

AARP

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Published June 11, 2025

Billy Fiorelli sitting in a wheelchair in front of the World War Two Memorial fountain while his husband kneels beside him

Billy Fiorelli and his husband Paul (kneeling), in front of the WWII Memorial in Washington.

Chris Ferenzi/Wish of a Lifetime from AARP

For most of his life, Billy Fiorelli, 77, has carried a quiet type of grief.

A Navy corpsman during the Vietnam War, Fiorelli never saw combat overseas. Instead, he spent a year in 1968 working in the psych ward of the naval base hospital in Jacksonville, Florida, caring for soldiers struggling to cope with the psychological toll of war.

His service was unexpectedly cut short after he contracted mumps, resulting in the loss of a reproductive organ. Still, his quiet service on the home front — like that of so many others — left a lasting impact on the lives of those he helped.

As a gay man coming of age in conservative Cheyenne, Wyoming, and serving under military rules that made homosexuality grounds for an immediate dishonorable or other than honorable discharge, Fiorelli lived much of his early adult life with caution.

“It was hard coming out — just the stigma behind that. You’re scared to death that somebody’s gonna find out and say something to somebody else, and then all of a sudden it’s all over Cheyenne. You worry like the dickens,” Fiorelli said.

But the quiet grief Fiorelli carried transcended his sexuality. The veteran had been grappling with the profound loss of a childhood friend and neighbor, William Esslinger, who was drafted into the Army. He was killed in action in 1967 at age 21. The Wyoming native never forgot about him.

“He didn’t wanna go. But he said he’ll go in and serve his country. Next thing I know, I’m attending his funeral,” Fiorelli said.

So after the Vietnam Veterans Memorial was built in the 1980s, Fiorelli knew Esslinger’s name would be etched onto that wall, and it was his mission to find it.

“I’ve been wanting to come to Washington, D.C., for 50 years or more,” Fiorelli said.

Billy Fiorelli, seated in a wheelchair, pointing at a name on the Vietnam Memorial wall while his husband escorts him

Billy Fiorelli escorted by his husband Paul at the Vietnam Veterans Memorial in Washington.

Chris Ferenzi/Wish of a Lifetime from AARP

A long-awaited journey

Fiorelli came out after leaving the military. Not long after, he met his partner, Paul, who he has been with for more than 40 years. The couple has been married since 2016, and together, they’ve built a life in Cheyenne.

Despite the support from those closest to him, the only recognition Fiorelli received for his military service was a few words of praise from his supervisor. So when Paul read about a trip honoring Wyoming veterans at the war memorials in Washington, D.C., he thought Fiorelli was an ideal candidate.

Paul sent a nomination letter describing how his husband came from a family entrenched in military service and expressed his hope that the trip would help him find closure.

Wish of a Lifetime From AARP selected Fiorelli and 15 other Vietnam-era veterans from Wyoming to participate in the Voyage of Valor trip. The group toured many of the major war memorials and monuments in Washington, D.C., and Arlington, Virginia.

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But the most profound moment for Fiorelli was visiting the Vietnam Memorial and seeing his childhood friend’s name, William Esslinger, etched onto the wall.

With help from volunteers, they transferred Esslinger’s etching onto a sheet of paper, shading over it with a pencil. Fiorelli said he felt a deep sense of gratitude in holding the meaningful keepsake to honor his neighbor.

“That was my mission: to find him and just have closure. I took that long to get to him, but thanks to [Wish of a Lifetime], they made my wish right,” he said.

Pride and recognition

For Fiorelli, the trip also gave him the recognition he’d never expected to receive.

He found himself tearing up when a boy on a fifth-grade school trip, who had learned about the Vietnam War in class, approached him with a handwritten letter bearing his name.

“I start reading these letters and other pamphlets they had in there, and I start bawling,” Fiorelli said. “He says, ‘I’m sorry to make you upset.’ I go, ‘No, no, these are happy tears.’ ”

Wyoming’s Senator John Barrasso and Representative Harriet Hageman also honored the group through a meet and greet. Once Fiorelli returned home, Barrasso wrote a personal letter thanking him for his service.

But it didn’t end there. When the veterans returned from the Voyage of Valor trip, Cheyenne community members greeted them with a welcome rally and a celebratory motorcade through the city.

“They said, ‘Welcome home.’ That just got to me, that hit me. Finally, we’re getting the recognition that we should’ve gotten years ago,” Fiorelli said.

The Vietnam War veteran feels that his community has made significant progress in accepting gay people and said he feels proud to be recognized in such a special way.

“All through my life, I was scared to death to say anything,” Fiorelli said. “It’s fantastic to be honored like this. Never before in my life did I ever get acknowledged at all.”

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