AARP Hearing Center
.jpg?anchor=17,8&q=80&color=ffffffff&u=8wsalu&w=375 "Fall Movie Preview 2026")
5 Financial Tips for When an Adult Child Moves Back Home
For many empty nesters, the roost isn’t so empty anymore
5-minute read
Peter Arkle
Key takeaways
- Nearly half of boomerang parents say an adult child’s return has affected some aspect of their finances.
- Setting clear expectations for a boomerang kid’s financial responsibility and progress toward independence is essential.
- Establishing a target move-out date can help prevent boomerang arrangements from becoming permanent.
Once a child has left the nest, the plan is usually for them to live on their own ever after. Yet nearly half of parents with adult children ages 18 to 35 say an adult kid has moved back home at some point, a 2026 Thrivent survey found.
This past summer, Erica Fite, age 62, and her second husband found themselves living in their New York City home with their four adult children. “This is a problem with so many kids everywhere, or just people in general — you can’t afford to live in the places where you want to work,” she says. That’s one of the reasons they decided not to charge their kids rent.
More Ways to Benefit
- Related Benefit 1
- Related Benefit 2
- Related Benefit 3
- Related Benefit 4
- Related Benefit 5
However, living with so many people under one roof presented logistical challenges. “Adulting is kind of hard,” says Fite, founder of the advertising agency Fancy LLC. “You fall into old habits.”
“They know they have to clean up after themselves, but their definition of cleaning up is a little different than ours,” she adds. To bring a semblance of order to the chaos, Fite and her husband set some ground rules. For example, each kid could only use one bath towel per week to avoid a mountain of laundry, and no dirty dishes could be left in the kitchen sink.
High rent prices, growing student loan debt and an overall lack of affordability are pushing financial pressure on many young adults, leading a swell of them to move back in with their parents. But welcoming a boomerang kid into your home can be rife with financial and emotional potholes. Experts recommend taking these five steps to avoid common pitfalls.
Put your retirement first
Having adult kids move back in can lead to higher bills, such as bigger utility and grocery costs. If you’re planning to take on all or a portion of those higher expenses, make sure you can afford to without jeopardizing your retirement savings.
“The worst thing you can do for your children is to not be self-sufficient yourself when you’re retiring,” says Cynthia Hutchins, director of financial gerontology at Bank of America Merrill. She says some parents automatically foot the higher bills because they want their boomerang kids to feel welcome, but they may sacrifice their own nest egg in the process.
According to the Thrivent survey, 47 percent of boomerang parents say having an adult child move back home has affected some aspect of their finances.
Do the math to see whether you can realistically afford to have your kid living with you, especially if you aren’t planning to charge them rent. Reviewing your bank statements from the previous 12 months can help you determine how much you’re currently spending.
Consider ways they can contribute
Experts recommend parents set clear expectations for a boomerang kid’s financial responsibility and progress toward independence.
You might decide to charge them rent, perhaps half of what they would pay otherwise, says Hutchins, giving them a reprieve while they build their savings to live on their own again. Or perhaps you charge them the difference in your utilities, groceries and other everyday costs while they live at home. There may also be nonmonetary ways for them to contribute, such as cooking meals for the household.
If your kid is returning home because of a layoff, make sure they’re actively applying to jobs so that living under your roof serves as a bridge, not a permanent safety net. “You want to make sure that they’re not just moving in and sitting in the basement playing video games,” Hutchins says. “There’s a big difference between helping them out with purpose and just enabling them.”
Set milestones — and a timeline for moving out
Giving an adult child a safe place to land can be an act of generosity, but it shouldn’t become a permanent arrangement. Before they move in, define their goals, including the financial or personal milestones they need to reach to move out. Perhaps they need to set aside a certain percentage of their paycheck during their stay, says Megan McCoy, program chair for the personal financial planning program at Kansas State University.
Consider setting an expected move-out date from the outset, even if it’s tentative, so there’s a specific target in mind.
Put the arrangement in writing
One of the most common mistakes that Ryan Sullivan, a certified financial planner and vice president at investment firm Hartford Funds, sees parents of boomerang kids make is relying on a verbal agreement for the arrangement.
He says it’s best to put an agreement in writing, even if it’s not a legal contract, so that everyone is on the same page. The terms might include rent payments, chores, guest policies and use of common areas. Having even an informal written agreement sets the tone that this isn’t an invitation to move in permanently, while also lessening the chance of miscommunication and potential resentments, Sullivan says.
Schedule check-ins
Boomerang arrangements can veer off course, especially if established boundaries aren’t respected. Putting time on the calendar to check in with your kids and communicate is essential, says Sonya Lutter, director of financial health and wellness at Texas Tech University’s School of Financial Planning.
Consider meeting biweekly or monthly, and pencil in the gathering on everyone’s calendar. Lutter says a good conversation starter is to ask, “Is this going how you expected?”
“It seems like a simple question, but you can get so much information,” she says. “Maybe the parent didn’t realize what joy it could be to have their kid back home, or that now they don’t have to do yard work. And then I would always have something future-oriented. So, ‘Are we still on target for whatever end date was?’ or ‘Are you still feeling good about the direction that we’re going?’ ”
These check-ins give both parents and adult children a chance to adjust expectations, address small issues before they turn into bigger conflicts and celebrate progress.
AARP Membership
Join AARP for only $15 per year with automatic renewal. Get instant access to members-only products and hundreds of benefits, a free second membership, and a subscription to AARP The Magazine.
More From AARP
Which Valuables Deserve Space in a Home Safe?
Here are the key items to store, plus what features to consider when shopping for a safe
Hidden Costs of Buying Your Teenager a Car
Insurance, repairs and gas turn an automobile purchase into a long-term expense
Helping Your Kid Buy Their First Home
From down payment gifts to mortgage cosigning, many parents are offering support