Essay: We Moved to Los Angeles for the Chiller Vibe. And Then the Fires Hit

Wednesday morning, my husband took the eeriest video. There were parts of the sky that looked normal — and then clouds of smoke that completely blocked out all light. It looked apocalyptic. 

I spent countless hours Wednesday night staring at my phone to see whether we needed to evacuate and to check on our house being remodeled. The Watch Duty app is my new best friend. It shows where all the fires and evacuation zones are. At least one new fire started just last night. I dug out an old cross-stitch project to help take my mind off of the fires. I wanted to have a drink or a gummy, but I needed to stay sharp in case I had to pack quickly and drive to a safer place.

I gassed up my car and got cash. I tried to pick up a prescription, but the pharmacy was closed. Everything felt strange. It reminded me of early COVID days or right after 9/11, when you would try to do normal things but everything felt so off. 

I made a list of essentials to pack. But putting together a go bag seemed too real, and I couldn't do it. 

I thought about the four pets I would have to get into the car, along with everything else, if we had to leave. Our two cats seemed unfazed, but our two dogs could sense something was off. They did not like going outside while the winds were blowing, and you could see them sniffing the air.  They were extra cuddly with me, which was a comfort.

Diane Small and her dogs.

Courtesy Diane Small

I slept off and on, waking up to check the app, not trusting that I would get the emergency alert on my phone. When I finally got up this morning, I saw that the fire closest to us had been contained. I breathed a sigh of relief.

But we're still not entirely in the clear. Wednesday into Thursday, there was ash "raining" everywhere. We still need to wear a mask outside. You can see the sun trying to shine through, but it feels like dusk all day.  It reminds me of the last weather event we went through here in December 2022, when it wouldn’t stop raining. Our local friends said it wasn’t normal. That we must have brought the rain with us. 

My "new"  friend group has been wonderful. We are all checking on each other. Several of them know people who have lost everything. It has been devastating. But still we keep going — checking in, boosting each other up. 

My daughter's winter break was ending; it was sad to realize I was actually happy to see her go — to be somewhere safe from here. 

Since we have only lived here a few years, I keep thinking that we are new and will just get used to things like this. We have also experienced a few small earthquakes — there's an app for that, too. 

My friends who have lived here for decades or their whole lives have told me this is not normal. It's really scary for them, too. Schools are closed because of the fires. My East Coast friends are telling me they are having snow days. Snow days were fun! This is quite the opposite of that. 

We are hoping that all of these fires can be contained soon, but while I was writing this, a new one broke out. So far, they are all far enough away from our new house that we haven’t had to evacuate. It shouldn't even affect the date we expect to finish our house.

I have mixed emotions about our new home. I am excited to move in, but it is scary to think that we could lose our house before we even finish it. So many people have lost their homes. And it’s not over yet.

I'm still glad we made this move. There is no perfect place to live, and I really love Los Angeles. The people are kind and relaxed, the tacos are amazing, and the weather is great — most of the time.