How Tapping Into My Inner Goddess Led to a Career Change

After my yearlong manifestation journey to become my best self, I’ve found a new calling

Melina Bellows,

AARP

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Published November 14, 2025

a graphic collage combines feline imagery with female faces taken from a classical painting style. The collage was inspired by a breathwork ritual to reclaim parts of the author that had been fragmented by buried trauma.

Author Melina Bellows‘ collage art has accompanied each story in her eight-part manifestation journey. The art here was inspired by a breathwork ritual to reclaim parts of herself that had been fragmented by buried trauma.

Melina Bellows

This is the eighth and final installment in a series:

Part 1: Can Your Thoughts Change the Trajectory of Your Life?

Part 2: Can She Pass Her First Manifestation Challenge?

Part 3: Her Manifestation Revelation Was Not What She Expected

Part 4: Deepak Chopra Brings One Woman's Manifesting Journey Full Circle

Part 5: Thanks to a Spiritual Medium, Her Journey Reaches a Higher Plane

Part 6: How I Manifested My Dream Birthday — and a New Love

Part 7: I Went to a Breathwork Class and Left Transformed

Two weeks after a transformative breathwork class, I met again with breathwork practitioner Eleonora Berenyi in New York City for a private “Soul Retrieval” session. Surrounded by feathers, crystals and the low hum of a shamanic drum, Eleonora guided me through a ritual meant to reclaim the parts of myself I’d left behind during old traumas.

I followed her chanting with the three-part breath I’d learned in the breathwork classes. (Read about it in Part 7.) Eleonora took me through the dark moments of childhood trauma, adolescent shame, my son’s difficult birth and the heartbreak of my divorce. I sank deeper into a lucid-dreaming trance state — and then, suddenly, I began declaring over and over, “A high priestess is born.”

I hadn’t planned to say it. I didn’t even know what it meant. Perhaps, as I was retrieving lost pieces of myself, some primal aspect of my psyche was reclaiming a strength that had been buried beneath life’s challenges.

When the session ended, Eleonora gave me homework: Explore my “divine feminine,” a spiritual concept Deepak Chopra explains as a “nurturing, devotional, compassionate, loving, intuitive or reflective energy” not limited by gender. She also suggested “inner-child dates” (doing something just for fun), asking my angel guides to connect me with my highest priestess self, belly dancing, joining a goddess circle and womb healing.

“Your womb is your cauldron,” she said. “Your writing — and everything you want to manifest — will take off if you heal it.”

I didn’t sign up for belly dancing lessons, nor did I know of any local goddess circles. However, I did start to make beauty a priority — small rituals of joy, such as treating myself to Trader Joe’s flowers for my dining-room table, and taking the time to notice the sky, imagining it as a spectacular canvas painted just for me each day.

I also made a deliberate shift from the yang of doing to the yin of being. Yang has always been my default, but my teachers Suzanne Eder and Deepak Chopra both maintain that real power lies in yin — the softer, feminine side.

As I began living with more softness and presence, I found myself guided by an inner knowing that felt both ancient and newly kindled. I went to hear Eckhart Tolle speak about the power of tuning into the now. During daily meditation I focused on physical sensations. More and more, I encouraged myself to go with the flow rather than fight the current.

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a graphic and photo collage shows a young man having makeup applied to his face. Inset in the collage is a black and white photo of a makeup table

The author’s son is studying at the Savannah College of Art and Design.

Courtesy Melina Bellows

That inner guidance was tested the morning my son announced he wasn’t going back to college. The old me — the fixer, the planner — rose up instantly. High priestess or not, I was on the verge of a bad reaction. I gulped some coffee, then took a breath and remembered that manifestation isn’t about control — it’s about alignment.

How could he and I align on what was truly in his best interest?

“What’s your dream?” I asked calmly.

“I think I want to go to SCAD,” he said, referring to the Savannah College of Art and Design.

I handed him my credit card to apply. Within a week he was accepted and received a $15,000 scholarship. Watching his confidence unfold — to want better for himself, to outgrow what no longer fit — felt like a meaningful upgrade for both of us.

When my son took his leap, I knew it was time to take mine. I started researching life-coaching programs — Georgetown, Harvard and the Co-Active Training Institute — all around $14,000 and all online, which was not what I wanted. Then I learned about a Maryland program that happens to be the only community college with an International Coaching Federation credentialing program.

The best part? Because I’d just moved in-state and turned 60, my tuition would be … zero.

Deepak told me during our very first conversation, “Look for the synchronicities — they’re the universe winking at you.” (See Part 4.)

I laughed out loud. The universe wasn’t just winking — it was smirking. When things are meant to happen, they take on a momentum of their own.

After a year of seeking signs and teachers, I realized that the thing I’d been searching for all along — guidance, purpose, connection — wasn’t outside me. It was inside, waiting to bubble up — just as it did at that resort pool in Mexico (see Part 6), when the idea of becoming a life coach first surprised me out of the blue.

Through this yearlong journey, I’ve learned that guidance often comes disguised as longing. Suzanne Eder once told me, “Your deepest desires are divine breadcrumbs — they lead you back to yourself.” (See Part 1.)

And so, as this manifestation series comes to a close, I find myself not at an ending but a beginning: one hand on my heart, one on my notebook, stepping into the role I’ve been preparing for all along — a guide who finds purpose in helping others discover the joy that’s already within them.

AARP essays share a point of view in the author’s voice, drawn from expertise or experience, and do not necessarily reflect the views of AARP.

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Melina Bellows is an award-winning author, media executive, and speaker with a passion for storytelling, purpose-driven brands, and empowering the next generation. Her latest book, The Lost Women of Science, shines a light on the overlooked pioneers who helped shape modern science.

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