Is It Time for Your Loved One to Retire From Driving?

Perhaps the best test is whether you want the grandkids as passengers

Stacey Colino & Deirdre van Dyk,

Updated May 01, 2025

AARP

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En español

Published October 21, 2021

/ Updated May 01, 2025

Stocksy

Getting older isn't necessarily a reason to give up driving, but it may be a reason to carefully consider how well your loved one is doing behind the wheel.

Studies show “we will probably outlive our ability to drive safely by approximately 7 to 10 years,” says Scott Trudeau, director of practice engagement at the American Occupational Therapy Association (AOTA), who has evaluated the abilities of older drivers.

As we age, our reaction time slows and our vision, hearing, and coordination decrease. In addition, medical conditions such as arthritis, cardiovascular disease, dementia, glaucoma and macular degeneration, Parkinson's disease, and stroke can compromise a person's driving abilities.

“The more medications you take and the more medical conditions you have, the more at risk you are with driving,” says Gary J. Kennedy, director of geriatric psychiatry at the Montefiore Medical Center in New York City.

Not all older adults will hand over the keys at the appropriate time. "As we get older, we tend to develop a more positive outlook on things. The problem is, it gives us a false sense of security when it comes to things like driving,” says Gary J. Kennedy, director of geriatric psychiatry at the Montefiore Medical Center in New York City.

If you’re concerned about your loved ones driving, here are six ways to address the issue.

1. Take a ride with your loved one

To get a sense of your loved one’s road sense, ride along with them as they run an errand, suggests Sara M. Bradley, an associate professor of general internal medicine and geriatrics at the Northwestern University Feinberg School of Medicine in Chicago.

If red flags appear during the drive broach the conversation later by gently pointing out that you're concerned about your loved one's vulnerability on the road and ability to protect passengers from other, potentially more aggressive drivers.

Noting that the cognitive or motor-skills changes they're experiencing put them at greater risk from other drivers is “a better way to frame it than saying, ‘You're not safe,'” Kennedy says. “That way, they're less to blame.”

2. Encourage self-assessment

If you are unable to ride with them, or would like more input, AARP’s free SafeTrip app can be downloaded to a smartphone. The app gives feedback on braking, accelerating and cornering, scoring them against other drivers using the app.

A new safety feature, CrashAssist has recently been added. If a rapid deceleration is detected and an operator is unable to reach the driver, emergency services will be sent to their location. (Some Smartphones and watches have a similar built-in feature when a crash is detected. )

The AARP app’s data is never shared with insurers. “Your data is your own,” says Matt Sampson, senior online adviser at AARP Driver Safety. Family members can create a private group where they can share their own safety scores. “It could give you, as the caregiver, peace of mind that dad is doing just fine,” says Sampson.

If your loved one is more lo-tech, there are self-assessment questionnaires from the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration and AAA Foundation for Traffic Safety. You and your loved one can each take the test and discuss symptoms that might affect driving abilities.

"Sometimes they are aware that they're slowing down, and if it's approached as an ongoing dialogue, people tend to be more receptive,” Bradley says. Loved ones might recognize some of the signs in themselves and realize that they have been feeling less confident driving under certain conditions.

3. Get help from their physician

Sometimes, having someone they trust, like their doctor, broach the subject can be more effective than hearing it from their children.

Your loved one’s physician can suggest an occupational therapy evaluation. Ask if they can prescribe a comprehensive occupational therapy evaluation for functional status and community mobility, says Trudeau.

"These evaluations have nothing to do with licensure,” says George T. Grossberg, director of geriatric psychiatry at the St. Louis University School of Medicine in Missouri. Knowing this may ease a family's reluctance to have one.

To assess your loved one, an occupational therapist will determine a baseline through visual, physical and cognitive screenings, says Trudeau. Then they will go through some performance-based tests, such as cooking, looking for any impulsive behavior or a failure to notice safety cues.

The evaluation might “find that the person is a safe driver but not at night or in areas they don't know,” Grossberg says.

In other words, your loved one may realize that it makes sense to put some restrictions on his or her driving rather than putting an end to it altogether.

A red traffic light and a red stop sign next to each other

LeszekStodulski/Getty Images

Driving warning signs

Medical issues aren't the only reasons to worry about driving abilities. Here are some signs that suggest an older family member should have second thoughts about driving. Are they:

Driving too slow or too fast consistently?
Getting lost on familiar roads?
Having recent car accidents or near misses?
Having trouble parking or turning left?
Receiving tickets for driving violations?
Running red lights or stop signs?
Showing up with new dents or scratches on the car?
Using lanes improperly?

The best test: Are grandchildren allowed in the car when the older adult is driving? If not, “this is a clear indicator of peril, and it is time to retire from driving, not just for the sake of the driver's grandchildren but for all the other kids on the road,” says Gary J. Kennedy, director of geriatric psychiatry at the Montefiore Medical Center in New York City.

4. Check how they position themselves in the car

In some instances, the specialist “can suggest vehicle adaptions that make it safer for the person to continue driving,” Bradley says.

AOTA and AARP hold CarFit events in local communities. A technician observes how your loved one is seated behind the wheel, checking how the car seat and mirrors are positioned.

They may suggest adjustments to minimize blind spots or correct foot position on the gas and brake pedals to improve abilities. (Using just the toes to press the pedals can slow reaction time.)

5. Take a driver safety class

Help your loved one brush up driving skills, road rules or familiarize themselves with new car safety features, such as drowsy driver alerts, through free online or in-person classes.

Your loved one may also, depending on what state they live in and their insurance coverage, be able to decrease the annual cost of insurance by paying for a defensive driving class. AARP Smart Driver, AARP Smart Driver TEK, AAA RoadWise Driver and insurance companies offer courses that give refreshers on traffic rules, new road design and car safety technology.

6. Explore other transportation options

Even if your loved one is currently still safe to drive, it’s a good idea to plan for the future. “You want to begin to think about how you’re going to maneuver in the community, should your condition deteriorate,” says Trudeau. “How will you compensate for an inability to drive later on?”

Ease them into car-free life by exploring online grocery and pharmacy delivery services and research local transportation in their community. Try setting up a taxi, Lyft or Uber account on your loved one's smartphone and show them how to use it to, for example, to get to a doctor’s appointment or to meet friends for dinner.

"Rather than saying, ‘Stop,’ say, ‘Let me help,’” Kennedy says.

Preparing to age out of driving should be normalized, says Trudeau. “We pretty much know it’s going to happen to most of us.”

More information

Free driver safety resources

AARP Smart Driver TEK. Classes on car safety features and technology can be taken in-person, in a live virtual format or through self-paced videos.
AARP SafeTrip app is free for anyone to download and get insights into their driving habits.
CarFit. To find events where you can have your car and driver checked near you, check here.
AARP’s virtual community center. Online classes show users how to use Lyft and Uber services. Look for a class here.
AAA has downloadable PDFs with self-evaluation checklists, car technology and transportation alternatives.
National Highway Traffic and Safety Administration has information about driving with medical conditions and on adapting vehicles.

Classes that may lower insurance

There is a fee for the classes but, depending on the state, taking it may qualify you or your loved one for a discount on car insurance premiums.

AARP Smart Driver classes teach defensive driving techniques, how to adjust driving to compensate for age-related changes and a refresher on road rules. They can be taken in-person, in a live virtual format or self-paced videos.
AAA has a suite of driver’s education classes, including RoadWise Driver which offers defensive driver classes for older drivers.

This article, originally published in 2021, has been updated with additional expert advice and more information on driver safety.

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Stacey Colino is an award-winning writer, specializing in health, psychology and science. Her work has appeared in The Washington Post, U.S. News & World Report, Prevention, Newsweek, Parade and many other national magazines.

Deirdre van Dyk is an AARP associate editor covering Social Security, caregiving, technology and fraud. She previously worked at USA Today and Time, where she covered business, government, sustainability and innovation.

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