‘Nonnas’ Star Brenda Vaccaro: ‘Keep Your Spirit Perky!’

The Oscar nominee shares her advice for aging, as well as memories of her family and the Hollywood icons she's worked with

Tim Appelo,

AARP

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Published May 06, 2025

Stars of the Nexflix comedy ‘Nonnas’ are pictured in front of the Enoteca Maria restaurant

(From left) Susan Sarandon, Talia Shire, Vince Vaughn, Brenda Vaccaro and Lorraine Bracco in the Netflix comedy “Nonnas.” After losing his mother, a man risks everything to honor her by opening an Italian restaurant with actual nonnas — grandmothers — as the chefs.

Jeong Park/Netflix

Sweet-faced, gravel-voiced Brenda Vaccaro, 85, shot to stardom in 1969’s Midnight Cowboy, earning a Golden Globe nomination for most promising newcomer. In 1975's Once Is Not Enough, she got an Oscar nomination for playing writer Jacqueline Susann's fictional takedown of Gloria Steinem (who refused to write the Valley of the Dolls movie and panned her books) as plastic surgery-loving Linda Riggs, a character critic Brian Herrera calls "a shocking, slutty, potty-mouthed cross between Helen Gurley Brown and Rhoda." Vaccaro lived with Michael Douglas, partied with Jack Nicholson, played Faye Dunaway’s fellow wiseacre witch in Supergirl (1984), Barbra Streisand’s bestie in The Mirror Has Two Faces (1996) and Al Pacino’s sister in 2010’s You Don’t Know Jack — and his wife in Quentin Tarantino’s Once Upon a Time in Hollywood (2019).

Now she’s got a role that really plucked her heartstrings: one of four grandmas, or “nonnas,” who open an Italian restaurant in the Netflix comedy Nonnas (airing May 9), also starring her fellow Oscar nominees Susan Sarandon, 78, Talia Shire, 79, and Lorraine Bracco, 70. Vaccaro told AARP about her memories, her new movie and how fun it is to be an octogenarian still in the game.

Making ‘Nonnas’ awakened memories of her dad, Mario Vaccaro

"He was born in Sicily. He graduated from NYU with honors. But it was the Depression, he had a wife with a baby — hello! And he couldn’t get a job. So he opened up a little restaurant called Mario’s, in Dallas. People like Nat King Cole used to come. Because he stayed open late for these guys, they would bring their people that were on stage with them. They would all come to Mario’s.

"Jimmy Durante came, and he’s singing, 'How could you believe me when I said I loved you?' And I sang it with him — we held hands, and I was on top of the table. He turned to my father and said, 'She’s going to be in show business.' We all knew where I was headed, and it wasn’t the restaurant business."

Her ‘Nonnas’ character, Antonella, is a widow, like her mom

"Antonella has breakfast with a picture of her husband across from her. I can’t imagine doing that — I’d end up saying, 'But you’re dead! What good are you?' My father died when my mother was 52; he was 54. Coronary thrombosis. In those days, they didn’t have Eliquis, right? That damn thing hits your heart and you’re dead. He died with his hands on the table; his head was back with a slight smile on his face. Poor guy! He could have popped an Eliquis. I take Eliquis. My mother lived forever. Antonella needs a new perspective, and she finds it in friendships — she finds her spirit. That’s my favorite word. Don’t lose your spirit! When I read the script, I was so moved. I thought, 'I wish my mother was alive just so she could read this.' "

It’s a movie with a message

"Just be happy! Because you’re here and you’ve got a lot to appreciate; you’ve got a lot to go. You know, you’re not finished. Why? Because you’re 80, because you’re 88? No way. Just call up Rita Moreno [93]. She’ll dance for you. I don’t need to say I feel young — I am, in my own timing."

Her secret to happy aging

"Keep your spirit perky! As you get older, you got to get better, calmer. You let go of a lot of stuff. In a Detroit jazz club in the ’70s I met a guy, he was so old. He said, 'You got to remember one thing, baby: Life is flowin’ and glowin’. That’s all it is.' It’s my motto. If I ever write a book, I’m going to call it Life Is Flowing and Glowing.

"I saw another movie with a bunch of actresses in it, about getting older, and I had to get up and leave, I was so offended. I don't think there’s anything wrong with getting old! I think it’s a joyous state of being in a joyous state of mind."

She bonded with the cast, who collectively have been nominated for eight Oscars, 14 Emmys, 17 Golden Globes and four Tonys

"I respected all those ladies — boy, we had some heavyweights there. I never had so much fun. It’s Nonna Power! In one scene, we’re all sitting around getting our hair done, drinking limoncello, talking about our families. When I was young and wasn’t listening to advice, my mother told me, 'Remember one thing, Brenda: Family is everything.' So in the movie I improvised: 'My kids are here and there, all over the damn place. But we are family.' So everybody took a shot at saying what family meant to them. As corny as it may sound, I found myself getting goose bumps."

In the creative process of these distinguished actors, food fights were involved

"In one scene I threw something at Lorraine — 'Bucha!' which means 'bitch' — and she hit me in the cheek with an apple. 'You’re gonna break my cheekbone here!' We laughed all the time. To be at this age and go back to work — I certainly had a great time."

Her mom advised her to avoid plastic surgery

"She used to say, 'Don’t do anything to [your face] when you get older.' I said, 'What do you mean? I’m an actress, I may have to.' I had an appointment in Hollywood with a big doctor. She said, 'I don’t want you to do it. Your aunts in Italy had the most gorgeous skin ever; they drank lemon water every day. You’ve got gorgeous skin. Don’t do it!' I damn well listened to her. I got makeup, a little rouge, but I don’t care what anybody thinks, I’m not doing it."

A few of her movies were awful, but not this one

"A lot of films you do, you go, 'Boy, we should have been better.' [In the Stinkers Bad Movie Awards, she 'won' worst supporting actress for 1981’s Zorro, The Gay Blade.] Nonnas is flawless to me. I call it my Jimmy Stewart movie. I worked with him in Airport 77. I loved him. He made you cry, he made you laugh, he was like my favorite family member. There was something about him that was just home, honesty, integrity all the way. I wish he could be with us opening night."

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Tim Appelo covers entertainment and is the film and TV critic for AARP. Previously, he was the entertainment editor at Amazon, video critic at Entertainment Weekly, and a critic and writer for The Hollywood Reporter, People, MTV, The Village Voice and LA Weekly.