When it comes to romance in the bedroom, ambiance matters.
The bedroom is where most couples have sex, so an environment that supports relaxation and sensuality can go a long way toward helping couples get in the mood. Years ago a female client came to my office with her husband of 30 years, concerned she had lost her sex drive. “Do you know what turns you on?” I asked.
“I have no idea,” she replied. “I can tell you what did it for me years ago, but none of that seems to work these days.”
Then she mentioned that the couple had recently sold their house after their children left for college. They were now renting, but she didn’t like the bedroom. She wanted a higher bed, a room with velvety, red curtains and a soft, fluffy area rug. She wanted scented candles and her favorite piece of art on the wall across from her bed.
But the couple’s lease prohibited candles due to the threat of fire and the pair hadn’t bothered to take their nicer belongings out of storage because they were renting temporarily. The bedroom didn’t have the satisfying ambiance the wife needed to relax or feel sensual.
Her husband listened. Later on, while his wife visited a friend for the day, he bought a thick mattress topper to elevate the bed, red curtains, a lambskin rug, and an oil diffuser with varied scents. He took the art out of storage, mounted it on the wall, and surprised her with a whole new bedroom when she returned.
They came back to my office the following week, excited about the fun sex they had enjoyed.
All this is to say that the setting really does make a difference. Paying attention to details in the bedroom can set the scene for an intimate connection. Here are 10 bedroom ideas that could amp up romance:
1. Light your environment — the way you want it
Some couples want lots of light in a bedroom to see each other, but not so much that it feels like a surgical operating room. Other couples may want little to no light because they originally learned to have sex in the dark or they like the allure and mystery of not seeing each other.
Even if you lean darker, consider candles, lights on dimmer switches, or the use of soft daylight through sheer curtains. Even opening the curtains and enjoying evening streetlights can be a creative way to see each other without feeling in the spotlight.