Stories from Caregivers: Sandy from CALIFORNIA
CA
Sandy
FROM CALIFORNIA
Hi my name is Sandy. I began taking care of my parents a little over a year ago. My mom Bonnie (90) and my dad Warren (89). My dad had Parkinson's Disease and my mom could no longer care for him on her own. I was living with them so I took over his care. He needed assistance with all activities of daily living. I fixed all meals for both of my parents, and took them both to their doctor appointments, as well as setting up and ordering their medications. I made sure they both took their medications at the designated times. Meal preparation and house cleaning. My mom fell and broke her leg in June and I was now doing double duty caring for both of them and helping them get around. The end of June my dad (90) had a stroke, I brought him home on hospice and he passed away on July 4th. It fell to me to make all the arrangements for his celebration of life service, my mom was not able to cope well as she was still healing from surgery on her leg. My mom has MCI and has trouble making big decisions. The best part of being there to care for my parents is that I had the opportunity to spend quality time with them. My dad and I laughed a lot and I was blessed to care for him in his final days. My mom and I have had each other to lean on while grieving his passing. The most challenging was not having the resources I needed as a caregiver to pay my bills, as it was not possible for me to take a job outside the home, and not being able to hire some help. My tips to other family caregivers is, listen to other caregiver's advice. Take time for yourself (the hardest part for me), get someone to come in and help out. It has been four months since my dad passed and I am finally able to de-stress. I still am taking care of my mom (91), and we moved my 85 year old aunt in with us. When she moved in, it quickly became apparent that she needed more help than my mom. My main duties now are arranging appointments and getting them there on time, ordering medications and making sure they both take all of them. Meal preparation and and house cleaning. I spend anywhere for 30-40 hours a week care-giving. I am able to carve out some time for myself (finally). Care giving for family is not easy (emotional toll), however, I wouldn't have it any other way. Family is important and caring for my parents and aunt has been/is a great joy.
