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Patti Stanger Wants the World to Find Love

Relationship guru stars in new CW reality show ‘Patti Stanger: The Matchmaker’


spinner image Patti Stanger against orange ombre background
Photo Collage: MOA Staff; (Source: Greg Doherty/Getty images for Secret Knock)

“Millionaire Matchmaker” Patti Stanger, 62, is back on-screen doling out relationship advice and pairing struggling singles with prospective partners in Patti Stanger: The Matchmaker, premiering April 11 on The CW. She shares with AARP the status of her love life and the celebrity client she’d love to match, plus she offers a wealth of insider dating tips for the 50-plus crowd.

This interview has been edited for length and clarity.

What’s the goal of your new show?

I hope the show teaches everybody about themselves in relationships — even if you’re in a relationship or dating — and that you come back for more, because I’m growing as you’re growing. So the more I learn, the more I’ll share with you.

What’s the secret to being a good matchmaker?

The biology hasn’t changed, just the technology. The best thing you can do as a matchmaker is be an investigator. And then if you’re a good casting agent, like I was before I was a matchmaker, you’ll know how to put together the two people who can star in their own movie, so to speak. 

Do you ever watch yourself on old episodes of The Millionaire Matchmaker? [The show is currently streaming on Netflix.]

No, I never watch myself, because I’ll start criticizing the way I look. I freak out. I’m like, What is with my hair? And what am I wearing? I don’t know how actresses watch themselves.

spinner image Justin Bird, Patti Stanger, David Cruz and Marisa Saks dressed up and smiling
Stanger starred for eight seasons on her reality show “The Millionaire Matchmaker.”
Vivian Zink/Bravo/NBCU Photo Bank/NBCUniversal via Getty Images

How’s your love life?

I just started dating. I broke up [with my partner] a year ago. It wasn’t easy. I was really in love with that person. There were just certain things that were deal-breakers that just didn’t work for us. I’m slowly getting out there. I just sounded the alarm with a couple of my matchmaker [friends] to fix me up. I’m gonna start traveling. I wouldn’t recommend any woman coming to L.A. [to date]; Florida is the best place [specifically Fort Lauderdale and West Palm Beach]. I’ve never seen so many good-looking guys in one place. 

Have any celebrities asked you for dating advice recently?

I can’t tell you [their names], but in the last six months, I’ve had three A-listers come to me and say, “Where are the men in L.A.?” They are just miserable. I said, “Get out of L.A.”

What celebrity would you like to work with as a client?

Hugh Jackman. He’d be the top of my list.

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What do you do to stay grounded?

I do Transcendental Meditation. I do it once a day. I should probably do it twice. I get into a state of gratitude, and I start pulling in my guides and start visualizing what I want and let it go.

What else do you do to stay healthy physically?

I [take] a million supplements. I eat gluten-free, dairy-free, sugar-free and I don’t drink alcohol. I walk. I do Peloton [workouts]. I love the ocean. I live across from the ocean, so when it gets warmer I walk on the beach. 

And spiritually?

I like to travel to Sedona [Arizona] to clear my energy. I believe in drawing energy to you. I do a little witchcraft, a little spell crafting. I just lit a candle last night for the full moon. I believe in communing with nature and God. I’m proud to be a Jew — but I’m not religious. I believe there’s so much more than religion that we don’t know.

 

Stanger’s Dating Tips for the 50-Plus Crowd

Put yourself out there. To find a date, Stanger suggests you step outside of your comfort zone and try something new. “Most people aren’t getting out of the house; they’re not connecting,” she says. “Maybe go to the Stagecoach [country music festival] or something you’d never do before. If you’re a hippie, go to Burning Man. Get out of your own way. Make stuff happen. I can’t tell you how many people I have met on vacation without looking for it,” she says.

Expand your dating age range. “It doesn’t have to be 10 down and 10 above [10 years older or 10 years younger than you], which was my traditional standard,“ Stanger says. She now says dating someone 15 years younger than you is OK.

Put the phone away. Once you are on a date, Stanger says, technology is getting in the way of personal connection. “I was on a date a couple weeks ago, and I was watching the room waiting for my date to show up, and everybody was on their phones while they were with their date,” she says. “Get the phone out of your face — or the iPad or the computer. Put that away and focus.”

Don’t overshare. Don’t launch into your divorce details or talk about past relationships too early on in a new one. And don’t ask the other person about those topics right away either, Stanger says. “In the course of the relationship, you’re going to find out about each other.”

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