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Forget FOMO. Embrace JOMO (the Joy of Missing Out)

This Is 50

Forget FOMO. Try JOMO

Illustration of a woman sitting on a yoga mat, tuning out the people behind her

REMEMBER THE fear of missing out, the sensation that someone, somewhere, was having more fun than you? Meet the joy of missing out, a.k.a. JOMO. You feel it every time you’re relieved when your social plans fall through.

“JOMO is crucial as you reach your 50s,” says psychologist Tali Gazit. “It’s about consciously choosing how to spend your time and energy.” Here’s how you can boost your JOMO.

Rock Concert Conundrum

What it is: The show won’t end till midnight!

What to do: There’s no shame in leaving before it’s over. In your 50s, losing sleep can put you at risk of a variety of chronic conditions, including diabetes and high blood pressure.

Party Overload

What it is: You’re invited to a huge event. You’d rather stay home in your pj’s.

What to do: Unless it’s a party to celebrate a significant milestone for a close friend or family member, it’s OK to send your regrets. Social connections are very important to your health, but there is such a thing as overdoing it, says Chris Barry, a psychology professor at Washington State University.

The Facebook Blahs

What it is: Social media leaves you depleted. 

What to do: Limit your exposure. Try setting a time limit of 30 minutes per day for checking on your friends’ enviable (or at least enviable-looking) lives. Such a limit can reduce anxiety and depression. —Eric Spitznagel


MY FIRST TIME

HEARING MY CLOTHES CALLED ‘VINTAGE’

Chupack and her “vintage” dress

Photo of Cindy Chupack next to a photo of her Christian Lacroix dress

Chupack and her “vintage” dress

DURING A CLOSET purge of clothes that, at 54, I wasn’t ever going to be young or thin enough to wear again, I decided to sell some dresses on consignment. As a TV writer, I’d amassed designer gowns for various black-tie events. Once a friend who was shopping with me for an Emmy dress asked the saleswoman, “Don’t you have anything fabulous in the back?”—and she reappeared with a couture Christian Lacroix strapless, hand-beaded gown that had only just been delivered to the store. Sold!

That Christian Lacroix and several other silky treasures were in the body-sized bag I unzipped at the shop. The clerk took one quick look and said, “We don’t take vintage.”

Excuse me? I thought. I bought these new! And not that long ago!

But then I did the math. “Not that long ago” turned out to be about 25 years. I sheepishly took my treasures home and stuck them back in the closet.

Then one day recently, I found my preteen daughter and her friend twirling in front of a mirror in two of my gowns, cinched in to fit with hair clamps. I recognized the feeling. In those dresses, I had always felt a little like a princess playing dress-up. But I also realized that those frocks are badges of honor—proof that my work and I were worth splurging on and celebrating. Sure, they may be “vintage,” but the dresses represent pride in a job well done, a pride I was able to share with my child. That kind of opportunity never goes out of style. —Cindy Chupack


Illustration of speech bubbles with funny faces

Do We Need a Gen Z Translator?

30 percent of Gen X workers say they have trouble understanding the slang used by coworkers from other generations.

SOURCE: PREPLY


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