This Is 50
The Grownup’s Guide to Tracking Your Adult Child
IT’S EASIER than ever for parents to keep tabs on their young adults when they leave home, with apps like Life360, WhatsApp and Find My. But experts say it’s key to balance the safety benefits of tracking with their kid’s personal growth and need for privacy.
Here are tips to keep in mind.
Know your motivation. Do you want to track your kid for safety reasons or surveillance? Looking at your kid’s location on a weekend night and questioning it can cause them to hide or cut you off.
Weigh safety versus growth. College is a time for your child to gain independence and learn about themselves. It’s become too convenient to see what your children are up to—it’s a habit more than a need, says Sarah Gallagher Trombley, founder of Digital Mom Media, which helps parents navigate the online world safely.
Contemplate the impact on yourself. For some parents, tracking their kids can actually create more anxiety. If something seems off, there’s not always a whole lot you can do, especially if they live in another city.
Have a conversation. Setting boundaries is a must to help keep you from patrolling their every move. Discuss expectations with your child, including when you will check their location and why. —Claire Leibowitz
MY FIRST TIME ...
USING A NOSE AND EAR HAIR TRIMMER
YOU KNOW THOSE scenes in horror movies when a character closes a mirror cabinet and a monster’s face appears? That’s how I felt one day in my early 50s when I looked in the mirror and found a “wolfman” staring back—stray hairs growing out of my nose and ears.
I’ve always been a low-maintenance guy when it comes to my appearance. When I started losing hair in my late 20s, I knew hair plugs or toupees were not for me. But nose and ear hair? That’s where I drew the line. An ear and nose hair trimmer now sits next to my toothbrush in the bathroom cabinet for my now-extended morning routine.
Am I happy about new hair in scary places? No. But I’ve come to realize my body will continue to change as I get older. And that’s OK. When the next change comes (and it will), I’ll be less surprised by and ready to accept—if not exactly embrace—it. Sure, it might mean a longer morning ritual, but more maintenance is a small cost for continuing to enjoy life. —Vincent O’Keefe