THIS IS 50
MY FIRST ...
... CHIN HAIR
ONE DAY when I was 51, my teen turned to me with a smile and said, “You have a hair on your chin.”
I flicked at my chin nonchalantly. I say “nonchalantly” because I assumed my kid had noticed an errant hair that had fallen from my head. But when I realized the hair was actually growing out of my chin, I went full-on chalant.
“How can this be?” I yelled, frantically yanking at the whisker while my teenager bent over laughing.
My mind traveled back to a moment when, as a teen myself, I had spotted a little whisker on my grandmother’s chin. Back then, I found it funny because it was so unexpected—and I assumed it was something that could never happen to me. I thought a hair on the chin of a woman was a sign that the woman was very, very old.
I now realize that at the time my grandmother was probably around the age that I am now. Did she know she had a whisker? No idea. I never mentioned it to her. You weren’t supposed to talk about such things with your elders.
I like to think that my grandmother knew about the whisker and had made her peace with it, as a natural part of aging. I could admire that. But you know what else I admire? My forthright child—and my kick-ass new tweezers.
—Lois Alter Mark
ON FINALLY OWNING YOUR AGE
Laverne Cox
Q: What’s your attitude on aging?
A: I started lying about my age in my 20s. When 40 happened, I was devastated because I thought there was no possibility of me ever becoming a working actor. It’s hard enough being Black and trans and a woman in Hollywood and then having to be older too. I had a speaking engagement in Texas and I said, “I'm going to say something I’ve never said in public before. I’m 47 years old.” The reality was no one in the room cared. Today, I proudly say my age.
Actor and Emmy-winning producer Laverne Cox, 53, appears in Clean Slate on Prime Video. Read her interview with Linda Childers at aarp.org/quickquestions.
A Celebration of Midlife
ON THE FIRST anniversary of her last period, Tracie Guy-Decker—my sister—wanted to celebrate her new life stage. A resident of Baltimore, the 49-year-old invited friends to a “Hot Flash Mob,” where guests wore red and played games around a fire pit. Tracie’s friend even created a signature “See You Later, Ovulator” mocktail for the occasion, featuring 7UP, grenadine and frozen cherries.
With Gen-X women more open about menopause than their elders, the idea of marking The Change with a party is catching on. Kelly Ripa, 54, reported on the trend last year, and in March, Halle Berry, 58, suggested calling such parties “shiestas.”
Not everyone is inclined to publicize their ovarian status. But in case you’re tempted to plan your own menopause shindig, we asked Beth Braun, a menopause guide with Elektra Health, for party theme ideas. Her suggestions:
HUMOROUS
Play menopause bingo (each square holds a menopausal symptom) and offer your guests ice packs and handheld fans as party favors.
SELF-CARE
Hire a massage therapist and offer a DIY essential oils or bath salts station.
CELEBRATION
Pop some bubbly, share your hard-won wisdom and create vision boards to map out your next chapter.
COMMENCEMENT
Decorate with a “Congrats, grad!” banner, don a mortarboard and gown and have guests sign a yearbook of memories. —Emily Guy Birken
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