I’ve had to be very patient with myself. I have had a lot of good, hard cries. And I went through depression. But everybody is recovering from something. That’s life. If nothing else, we recover every day from the shock of what it means to age. My memory used to be my superpower. Now I can’t trust my memory. But there are hidden gifts in everything.

Our mindsets, the stories we tell ourselves, become our realities. Find the tool kits that you need to move forward.

For one month after my bike accident, I didn’t leave my house. I couldn’t be on the phone or see any screens. And I read The Choice: Embrace the Possible by Dr. Edith Eva Eger. She was born in Hungary, and she became an Olympic gymnast. She was eventually sent to Auschwitz. That book most affected my recovery. And I found The Book of Forgiving: The Fourfold Path for Healing Ourselves and Our World by Desmond Tutu and his daughter Mpho Tutu. It’s about how apartheid devastated so many families and how they processed the act of forgiving. Sometimes the person you have to forgive the most is yourself.

I’m so glad I’m here! But I have to be more intentional about my health. I now drink non-alcoholic beer, for example. I discovered swimming in 2021 and joined the YMCA because I travel a lot and there is a YMCA in most towns. I’m not back to riding a bike yet, because I still have some balance issues. But I’m working on it.

I wait until the stillness finds me. I have a daily ritual of connecting to myself. I have a cup of coffee and stand with my bare feet on the grass. I welcome myself to the day. Less than a week ago, I was so upset about something, but I went outside in the grass that night ... and I sat there in silence, but I could see that I was a tiny part of a big picture. And I stayed until I felt peace.

When I was 10 years old, my family went to Sarasota, Florida, and my mother gave me four quarters for my allowance. There was a fantastic five-and-dime that sold sea monkeys. But we started attending a church there, and I knew it was important to tithe. When they passed the collection plate, I had those four quarters in my pocket, and I was, like, ­“Grrrrrr.” It was a fight, but I put one of those quarters in the plate. And that afternoon I was on the diving board at the pool, and I saw something shining on the bottom. I dove down, and it was a quarter. I felt like there was a puzzle in the universe and that I was connected.

Establishing some sort of community is essential, whether it’s finding a church community or a YMCA community or an AA community. Nobody does anything big by themselves. As we get older, some things fade, understandably, but problem-solving actually increases. To me, the adventure is connecting need and surplus. I love gathering in purposeful community. The best we can give each other is our presence, actually showing up for one another.

My first mother-in-law taught me a prayer. She said, “Lord, lead me today to those I need and those that need me.” I said, “Man, what a way to approach a day: ‘Lead me to those I need and those that need me.’ ”

What I have said for decades is that I can’t control anyone else’s choices, but I can control mine. We have to be intentional with the life that we have. One great thing about being in your 60s is that you no longer feel the pressure to make your mark in life. So I’m looking at other people my age and saying if we want to see change, it has to be our generation that does it. We’re in the perfect place. We’ve done what it is we’re going to do, but we’re not dead yet!