19 Conversation Starters to Help Avoid Awkward Interactions

7. What was one of the best days of your life?​​

​Pick up where you left off​

Because of COVID-19, you may see some friends for the first time in quite a while. Try to remember what was going on in their lives the last time you saw them and follow up. Same goes for extended family: At the last family gathering or family reunion, did a niece tell you about a new relationship or did a cousin mention a challenge they were facing? If so, ask how things turned out. Is news of a job change or work promotion traveling through the familial or friend grapevine? Extend your congratulations and express interest in learning more about what’s going on in the lives of others.​

​“A very important part of being at a reunion is catching up with people and finding out what they’re doing,” says 84-year-old Edith Wagner, editor of Reunions magazine.​

​8. Has anything big happened in your life since we last saw each other?​

9. What do you like to do for fun?​

10. What’s a delicious meal you’ve had recently?​

11. Are you facing any challenges these days?​​​

Talking to children​

​Youngsters can be shy even at family get-togethers, especially around people they don’t know. And at their age, at least for most, a year is a mighty long time to remember an exchange they may have had with you at a previous gathering. Inviting them to do a craft can keep their hands busy — and give the adults something to ask them about, Wagner says. Once the ice melts, you can then ask about their favorite sport, teacher or movie, or what they like to do with their friends.​​

But don’t ask children what they want to be when they grow up. “It’s a silly question,” Bostwick says. “They don’t know, and they shouldn’t know.”​

​Ask teens about what subjects interest them. Stick to interests, such as what they do after school (band, robotics, sports). Or ask about trends on TikTok or Instagram. You’ll likely get a lot of bang for your buck with that one. ​

​12. Do you have a favorite band or musical artist?​

13. Whom do you follow on social media?​

14. Have you had any interesting dreams lately?​

15. How are you spending your summer?​

16. What makes you laugh?​​​​

Talk about pets​

​Fido and Fluffy to the rescue! ​

People love their pets. In fact, a 2016 poll by Rover.com found that 61 percent of pet owners would end a relationship for their pet.​

“Everybody kind of gets tired of hearing about the kids, but no one gets tired of hearing about pets,” Gottsman says. “There’s something about a pet that unites. My husband calls them a ‘force multiplier.’ Good conversation begets good conversation.”​

If you’re a pet owner, give it a shot. Gottsman has found that talking about her 14-year-old poodle, Marty, tends to be a successful entry point into what might otherwise be a stiff or uncomfortable exchange.​

17. Does your pet have any favorite toys?​

18. Do you travel with your pet? ​

19. Does your pet have any personality quirks?​ ​​

​Take a break​

​Sometimes it’s not about starting a conversation but getting a break from one. Allowing yourself a time-out can be precisely what you need in order to recharge before going from one new conversation to another, especially if the gathering you’re attending is filled with your significant other’s relatives or people you don’t know well. ​

​Sarah Dunn, 60, of Waterbury, Vermont, remembers going to a family reunion with her now-husband, Dave, and his family six years ago. They’d been dating a year at that point. Because the event took place at a park on Lake Ontario, she could excuse herself from time to time to visit the shoreline.​

​“I could kind of come in and out of both human relationships and geographical relationships,” she says. “When I felt like I needed a break, I could take a walk to the water.”​

Just remember: If a conversation seems to be leading into delicate territory — or it’s simply run its course — you can always announce how thirsty you are and head for the lemonade.​​