Disrupt Your ‘To Do’ List!
9 Ways to Not Act Your Age
Dream! Dance! Disrupt! It’s time to take charge, take a class, take a naked selfie, be bold! Break your routine, break a sweat, break-dance! Turn your dinner party into a boogie ball; take a 22-year-old to lunch; learn Chinese. Age is not a preexisting condition, and there are too many ways you can shake it up. Get up on that stage and revel in disrupting the expectations of acting your age!
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1. Try stage-ing a comeback
What scares you? Public speaking? Meeting new people? Nothing is more exciting than conquering your fears, and what better way than going on stage? Try an Improv, acting, stand up, or singing class! There are plenty of open mics and improv workshops around. Test your skills at home with an online class from learnimprov.com or udemy.com and discover your inner Louie!
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2. Be a worldwide wanderer.
Hit the transatlantic trails! With all the apartment-trading websites out there, what’s stopping you from going to Madrid, Rio or the Riviera for a long weekend, a week, a month, a year? Living somewhere new is electrifying — the language, the people, the food, the culture, the romance. And when was the last time you heard someone say, “I’m so bummed I spent a month in Rome”?
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3. How about extreme(ly fun) sports?
Get high! Go for an adrenaline rush on the slopes or in the waves. Try a new sport like snowboarding, surfing or rock climbing. No longer just for 19-year-old dudes in dreadlocks and board shorts, adventure sports are open to all. And what better way to see new places and meet new people than by hitting the surf or turf and trying a sexy new sport?
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4. Dance! Dance! Dance!
Do it all night with your BFFs and your disco classics; do it alone to your favorite movie soundtrack ; do it with your honey to a corny moonlight serenade — just do it! Take a Zumba class, learn salsa dancing, go to an outdoor summer swing fest or get down at the local monthly square dance in a church basement. Put on your boogie shoes and dance away the blues!
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5. Skew your demographic.
Make a date with a 20-something, invite a younger coworker out for a drink, go to a hipster bar or plan a multigenerational mix and mingle. You’ll feel more connected, and so will they. Plus, you can finally find out what “finsta” is and they’ll get to hear about your disco nights at Studio 54. I always loved hanging out with older people and — surprise — now I am one!
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6. Learn something new.
How about Chinese? Not only will you expand your cognitive process, and get and stay smarter longer, but you’ll learn a language spoken by more than 873 million people with a 5,000 year-old-culture. Remember the days of going for long walks with language tapes in your Walkman? Long gone. Sign up for FluentU or Duolingo and have private Mandarin lessons while you walk the dog (or gou).
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7. Beauty routine too routine?
Dye your hair magenta; get a Brazilian; try crazy acrylic tips. Just change it up! I always want to talk to the lady with the green (or pink or blue) hair at a party, but why not be the lady with the green (or pink or blue) hair? Next time you’re at the salon, instead of going for the usual half highlights, shock yourself and say, “Make mine blue.”
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8. Garter belts to the rescue!
The cotton three-pack is fine, but splurging on some lacy lingerie and provocative near-nothings is a surefire way to feel good. You could also up the ante in a leopard-print
panty! Be your own Aphrodite; knowing that you’re wearing naughty knickers and a cupid-cup brassiere will add a tingle to your mingle.
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9. And then he kissed me …
Nothing gives you the same rush as having a crush! That giddy feeling you get when you run into him or her, coming up with witty things to say, and those magical mushy moments that make life more exciting. Whether you are widowed after 40 years or have more marriages behind you than Liz Taylor, falling in love is delicious and will keep your heart open and alive — and not acting your age.
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Nora Burns, a writer, is a founding member of the comedy groups Unitard and the Nellie Olesons, who also performs comedy solo.
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