What Makes a Superb Lover?

Think Outside the Bedroom

Fabulous lovemaking doesn't only happen between the sheets. Are you on the beach, in the shallows after most of the resort has gone to bed? Are you on a plane and your partner's hand slowly reaches for you under the cover? Would you pull off the road for a quickie? You might not want to follow all of these suggestions, but you get turned on by some of them, and are flattered that your partner wants to do these things with you.

Indulge Your Fantasies

Imagine, as you lay down in bed, your lover taps into one of your fantasies and whispers in your ear, "You are the sultan's daughter and I am but a lowly carpet salesman who has seen you in the market. Our eyes meet and we know. You imperiously call your guards and tell me I must come to the palace. I am afraid of course, but also excited. … When I get there you dismiss the guards and turn toward me. You say, "You must do what I say." … Well you get the gist. Who could not crave a person who makes your fantasies come true?

Use Your Eyes

I know eye contact sounds easy, but it isn't. Sex therapist David Schnarch says maintaining eye contact can create "wall-socket sex." If you never look away, but hold each other with your eyes, the intimacy increases exponentially. Electricity builds up between you and the world fades away. This is a major way to have transcendent sex.

Explore All Kinds of Kisses

Great lovers don't always kiss the same way. There are deep kisses, light kisses, delicate kisses and passionate lip-scrunching kisses. Furthermore, there should also be kisses in new places … surprising ones.

Be in the Moment

Great lovers do not have their Blackberry next to their bed. Great lovers have no one in their mind but the person they are with and they are 100 percent focused on their partner. They show by word and deed that they are interested solely in your pleasure. They are focused from the time you decide to make love to the time you both drift off to sleep. What could be more flattering and satisfying?

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