I hear this all the time: "There are no good men out there"; or this: "There are no good women." Usually the speaker illustrates one of the assertions with a sad or funny dating story that ends either with resignation to single status or with anger at the depressing situation he or she "has to" endure.  I listen sympathetically but don't share the conclusions.

See also: 8 ways to find love online.

Mature singles have plenty of great people to choose from; but of course, you have to know where to look.You already know that bars are a bad place if you want to find someone who is serious about finding a life partner (anyway, they're usually full of twenty-somethings who'd consider you an antique). You might have exhausted your local religious establishment or community singles organization.

Still, don't fret. Here are my favorite locations and some tactics to help you do well once you get there.

Meet Online

For sheer numbers of eligible, motivated people, you can't beat online dating websites. I know some of you have had bad experiences, but the good experiences outweigh those, from what your fellow singletons tell me.

To increase your chances for success, learn how online dating works. Pay attention to the person's writing — serious people tend to write quite a bit about who they are and who they are looking for. Be honest about who you are, about how you will be perceived, and about the kind of person who would appreciate you. You also need to stay open, warm, and flexible. Don't use a long, involved list of requirements that will narrow your choices down to four people on the entire planet. Instead select only your core, must-have traits.  
 
You can go to boutique online dating sites that select for people who want relationships and are so motivated that they will pay premium prices to find them. You probably know some of the more popular ones, but there are smaller, targeted sites you might not have known to try.

Some specialty sites include the following:

• For horse lovers, EquestrianSingles.com
• For pet owners, DateMyPet.com
• For wine lovers, WineLoversMatch.com
• For older men and women, SeniorPeopleMeet.com or BabyBoomerPeopleMeet.com

If a shared political philosophy is essential, there are dating hubs that satisfies to your political views. Gays and lesbians are welcome at most of the bigger sites but also have niche sites, such as GaySinglesOnline.com. Whatever your passion, or whatever your requirements, there is a site that caters to your preferences.

Next: Special places to meet. »