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Making Your Wishes Known

Finding Your Way: Talking About End-of-Life Treatment Decisions

Advance Directives - One way to communicate with your loved ones and health care providers

It’s natural to avoid thinking—never mind talking—about dying. As a result, most people do not make their wishes clear to their loved ones or their health care providers. This includes many people who are nearing the end of life.

One way to communicate your wishes about future health care decisions is through “advance directives,” which are legal documents that allow you to convey your decisions about your health care, especially end-of-life care. But fewer than half of severely or terminally ill patients have advance directives in their medical records, according to research sponsored by my agency, the Agency for Healthcare Research and Quality (AHRQ).

Long before you need care, decide

Even before you become old or ill, you need to think and talk about the kind of care you would want should a stroke, terminal illness or life-threatening event occur. Ideally, these discussions should take place long before you need care. If such conversations don’t take place, your family and physician must make decisions based on what they think you would want. As a physician, I know making decisions on behalf of a loved one is particularly difficult during an already stressful time.

End-of-life planning involves some thought and effort, such as completing advance directives. In addition to talking about your wishes with your family members, you should also talk with your doctor. Most doctors welcome the chance to discuss such issues but may be hesitant to raise the topic.

Doctor-patient discussion

We need more doctor-patient discussion in this area. As many as three-quarters of physicians whose patients had advance directives were unaware that those documents existed, according to research. And only 12 percent of patients with advance directives had received input from their doctor.

Discussing these matters increases the likelihood of getting your wishes met. Patients who are dying and family members who survive them say that lack of communication with doctors causes confusion about medical treatments, conditions and choices that need to be made.

AHRQ-funded studies show that conversations with doctors about advance care planning led to increased satisfaction among patients age 65 years and older. Patients who talked with their families or physicians about their preferences for end-of-life care:

  • Had less fear and anxiety;
  • Felt they had more ability to influence and direct their medical care;
  • Believed that their physicians had a better understanding of their wishes;
  • Indicated a greater understanding and comfort level than they had before the discussion.


Depending on your age and medical condition, your doctor may be helpful in starting your decision-making. But you can also rely on several good resources to help you, which are listed to the left of this column. Once you’ve considered your options and had discussions, you need to put your desires in writing in proper documents. Be sure to give copies to your family members and your doctor.

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