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I understand how you feel. Only it's my mother! Mom is 86. I am an only child (69 year old female). Since last January, I have been taking care of my parents. My dad passed away in June after being ill since February. He was here in my house (Hospice). Dad was 91.
Mom can still drive, takes care of her on business, but does little to nothing around here. I myself, physically have been clearing out their house, storage buildings, etc with some help from a neighbor. We did have some relatives who came over and helped pack up and move the major stuff. My parents are hoaders. Not as bad as on TV, but there is still a lot. Mom wouldn't go through it when my dad was sick. She has a bad heart and COPD and has been living here since Feb. 2012. My dad was here for a week in Jan. when mom had a heart attack. He broke his hip about 2 weeks after she got home and it was down hill from there. Mom started living with us then.
I never realized how hard headed, suspicious and controlling she was until she moved in. It is very difficult. We are planning on moving closer to my kids (300 miles away) at the end of the year. She bought a house there and now has decided that it is too small. Because she wants to keep all her old, broken down stuff. Currently, most of her "stuff" is in storage, because she was unwilling to go through it before, but she wanted to either rent out her house or sell it.
The only reason she bought the new house by herself, was also due to her trying to pinch a penny and go VA, which excluded my husband and I. However, we do have a realtive living there and paying the notes at this time.
I can not live like this the rest of my life or hers. So, my plan is to find someone to come live in after we move. That's going to be another challenge. Where are the "Golden Years"?