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first you need to realize you are in this alone. It is a prision sentence. Every year they live is a year taken from your life. There really is very little help out there for the caregiver.
If your "loved one" was in the military there is some hope. the VA will pay for adult day care. you need to find an adult day care center such as Saracare not a personal care home but an adult day care center speak to the addministrator she will know the qualifications. It is not dependent upon a service connected disability or income levelEvery state has a military home again not dependent upon income all have some type of military or resident requirement but it is minimal.
If you are not taking care of a vetran you really have a difficult time so my opinion is see an elder law attorney immediately to see if they can set up a medicare trust start squirreling away money. do not transsfer assets to your kids your kids may be trustworthy but what about their spouses. Get them into a home as fast as you can. pick a place convient to you. Do not let family or relatives make you feel gilty if they take them for a month they have an opinion otherwise forget them. We only have so long left while we are healthy and can live our lives.ust dont do it