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Ok, 37 years later, last 20 as a caregiver. Wife is bipolar, ocd, and dependent personalty disorder. Over the years, put up with the rages, verbal abuse, physical abuse, son did also, when finally, she gambled all the money away, went on spending sprees, and then age 60 she starts shoplifting. Whew, spent thousands keeping her out of jail. Now at home, she has decided to blame me for everything wrong in her life, verbal abuse and well, I said enough. Left not knowing she called the cops. Ouch. She called me and like an idiot came back. Then the verbal abuse began again. I said enough and left. Stayed away for one night then came back to say lets divorce, she had always threatend me with it if I didnt do what she wanted, so, she went into a rage. So, out the door I went. Next thing, cops everywhere. Arrested, arrainged in court assautl 4. She forgot to tell them she had quit her meds first of the month which explained the strange actions. But in this state, they believe the woman, she denies it, its battered wife syndrome. So, now thousands of dollars later, court date is coming up. She admits she lied, but, her divorce attorney says dont admit. So, now, we're looking at a trial. Thats screwd! My thought is get lost in the great american west. All we have is a retirement check, cant work, disabled, but, attorneys are acting like we have money, bank acct is empty. Already did one banko, after this will do another. Whats really aggravating, judge imposed a no contact order for one year, so, cant help her resettle, get her mental health care , its just terrible. From what the case mgrs say, its common situation. Shes left over 300 voice mails, attempted suicide, it just tears me up, cry a lot, but what can you do.
Thanks so much for sharing what must be painful explanations of your current situation. I agree that YOU should get help. It sounds like there is very little that yu can do right now to help your wife, but you CAN take steps to help yourself.
Do NOT have any contact with her; go through your attorney for messages, etc. Work on YOU right now, friend.