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oh my, we were married 45 years when my husband asked for a divorce. next thing i know he is charging on our credit card, on line dating service. not happy. life is getting better but do miss having him around.
The old saying "War is hell" can probably be interchanged with "divorce is hell." Very few of us get through the process without being injured.
I know this is hard, but you WILL survive. I assume that you have a good lawyer..if not, get one right away. Most states have no-fault divorces nowadays, so you should expect 50% of everything and hopefully, with a good lawyer, you should be able to find "most" of your joint money and property.
But, when all is said and done, it is your emotional health that you need to work on. Keep going to your support group and get some individual counceling, too. Many churches offer divorce recovery group experiences. And there is a private recovery group called "rebuilders". Check the internet to find programs near you.
You are going to have to work on recovery from this divorce; it doesn't just happen naturally and it most certainly doesn't come quickly. You have been married for a long time. Give yourself the time and attention you deserve to get back on your "single feet" once again.
I'm going to bet that when you look back on this a few years from now, you are going to be amazed at how strong you were and you are going to be proud of the strides you have made.
Thank you to all of you that wrote so openly and honestly about ending long term marriages/relationships at a stage in life that can be daunting, especially when there are serious health concerns. I am also "kicking" myself for being a "hope-aholic" and hoping after two separations over the last 35 years , hundreds of hours of counselling, emotional and financial infidelities, and charming,manipulative promises of change that our relationship/marriage would be different and all that I had "hoped" it would be in the golden years.........only to be diagnosed in 2000 with two auto immmune disorders and my husband seeking out his much younger and much healthier female staff members to spend his free time with . Apparently my physical and pharmacutical therapies and treatments became too tedious for this physician and his very young nursing staff so they helped him to hide finances, move joint properties and made false statements about me to the hosptial administration so that I can not call, email or come to the clinic property to try to retrieve my joint belongings and joint trust account finances that his new female "friend" has helped to remove and hide @ her home for their future use. I have gone back to my domestic violence support groups but this vindictive , deceitful behavior has sent my health that I was managing well into a downward spiral. Although I am exhausted by this unnecesary and dishonest behavior that I have to now spend time and finances fighting, your words and stories have inspired me to stay strong. Thank You.
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