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The Hermit has always been the tarot card (and archetype) with which I feel most familiar. The "gender" is one I often choose to ignore. There's a tarot deck, Tarot of the Crone, which depicts the 9th major in feminie terms, if you would find that helpful.
Hey, that's great to know. I'll look into that tarot version. I think some other folks I know would like to buy that deck.