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My mom died the year I turned 60 and she was 91. It was a relief. She'd lost too much of herself by then. I got sick of being a daughter, even though she was basically nice. Too much heartache in the process.
I did the independent thing too. That was a disaster. The independent publisher stole $20,000 from my husband and I for several of our books. The publisher gambled away the money and spent it on hookers, was forced into bankruptcy by the state. Etc. It was a mess. I won't do that again. I learned my lesson. I've been writing fulltime since 1981. My agent handles it.
I live in the boonies - the ideal writer's setting, so speaking engagements are expensive for me to do with gas being the price that it now is. I write what's important to me, mostly in fiction. As one famous writer once told me, a person can tell more truth in fiction. I learned this is true, with the story about my brother. No one can sue me in fiction.
One of the tv shows I was on to promote one of my books was in Toronto. It was a lovely city at the time. I wouldn't mind moving to Canada, if it didn't get so cold.
In Response to Re: Pubishing my mother's memoir:
Yes, my mother is still around. At 92, she has slowed down a bit and lives in an assisted living facility. I see her regularly as she is only 10 miles away. It is an interesting [and gratifying] experience to be my age and still be a "son."
Yes, I published the book independenlty [I do not use the phrase "self-publish" as it is laden with all sorts of negative connotations such as "You couldn't get a publisher?"] All the books I have written have been independently published.
I am sorry to read of your difficult publishing expereince. Have you tried to publish independently? [If not, see my posts on my independent publishing experience.]
This winter, I will take the "show on the road" with a virtual and "in person" book tour. I have found that the best strategy is to speak about a topic not about the book. For instance: "how to write your mother's memoir" will attract a larger audience than "my mother's life." People will buy the book as an example for what they want to do.
Since we are Franco-Americans [Francohone-Canadian-Americans] in a state that identified itself as 30+% Franco in the last census, I will also speak on being Franco in the 20s. 30s. and 40s (the timeframe of my mother's memoir) and I know this will also attract an audience. The topic will vary according to venue—there are cities with majority Franco populations.
Good luck to you.