This forum post is hidden because you have chosen to ignore skydiver70. Show Details
This forum post is hidden because you have submitted an abuse report against it. Show Details
Even when an individual goes to a nursing home, the family are still the caregivers.
My brother and I were caregivers for our Mom for a while. She would stay with my brother and his wife for a while and then she came to stay with my husband and I.
Mom had several falls that required hospitalization. She was placed in a Rehab after one fall and since she had no Power of Attorney for Healthcare, we couldn't find out what medications she was on. So near the end of her stay at that Rehab, she gave myself and my husband the Power of Attorney for healthcare and Durable Power of Attorney.
At that time, we found out she had been mixed up with a heart patient at the hospital before going to rehab for the fall. The hospitalist had quadrupled Mom's blood pressure medicine without our knowledge. She kept getting weaker and weaker at the first Rehab and that was why.
We never did find out what happened to the heart patient that was supposed to have the blood pressure medicine increased.
Then when she was discharged, she stayed with us for a while and then went home. She again fell and had to be hospitalized. The day she was discharged this time, my brother had to go to a VA clinic to have a physical and be assigned a VA physician in our local area. During the stress test, he suffered a massive heart attack and died the next morning at Vanderbilt Medical Center in Nashville, TN
Mom never did get over this. She had began to develop dementia, but it was not real bad at the time. Then the latter part of the month that my brother died, Mom got up during the night to use the potty chair, and fell and incurred a brain injury, and a broken shoulder.
She was hospitalized for about two weeks before they sent her to another Transitional Care Center at a nursing home. Even though I had the power of attorney for healthcare, they placed Mom on an antidepressant without telling me. Mom slept so much due to this and wasn't responding to therapy. Then one late afternoon, the nurse gave Mom an overdose of insulin and when we arrived at the nursing home as we did everyday, we heard a nurse being paged to Mom's room. When we got to her room, she was having a seizure. I asked what was wrong, and the nurses didn't know. They asked me if Mom had ever had a seizure and I stated she had not. I then asked the nurse, "have you checked her sugar"? He stated, No, but he had given her some insulin earlier. I later found out he lied about how much insulin she had been given. They finally gave her an injection of something to bring her sugar level up as it dropped to 28. She finally became alert again, but could never speak again. (She had had a stroke).
Therefore, she was never able to return to my home. She stayed in that nursing home for almost 3 years. She was abused and neglected. My husband and I went everyday to feed her as she was unable to feed herself after the overdose of insulin. I reported the neglect and the problems that I saw, but nothing was changed. I spoke with the ombudsman, without the nursing home doing anything. I contacted lawyers and they would do nothing, either. I checked with other nursing homes with the intent of moving Mom, but they either had long waiting lists, were so far away that I could not visit Mom, or would not accept Medicaid.
It was the most horrible experience I have ever gone thru in my life. As I saId, we visited Mom everyday without fail and eventually the Director of Nursing even suggested I stop coming so regular. That was because every time I saw someone neglected or abused I would draw their attention to it.
They wouldn' t feed Mom if I wasn't there. I spoon fed Mom every evening until she passed away Feb. 2009, as a result of one of the nurses suctioning her and suctioned too deeply, causing something to become lodged in Mom's windpipe. Mother could hardly breathe, so I demanded they call an ambulance, but they refused at first, until I kept demanding it. Finally, they called an ambulance and Mom was transported to the ER. There the doctor found they had suctioned chunks out of Mom's tongue and the inside of her mouth was covered in blood. They found she had a U.T.I. , dehydration, Sepsis. She lived 5 days and eventually suffocated.
We contacted lawyer upon top of lawyers and noone would take the case as they said the nursing home had lawyers waiting for cases like this and we coudn't win. I have an album of photos of where she had been abused, that I took while she was in the nursing home, but that didn't even help.
I almost had a nervous breakdown from this and still can't seem to function due to depression. I feel so guilty for placing Mom in a nursing home, but due to finances and health problems myself, I could not take care of her at home.
These nursing homes are torture chambers for the elderly and sick. I saw it with my own eyes, but was incapable of doing anything to change it. The "big Shots" at the top of the chain of command didn't care what happened to these helpless human beings. They need to be prosecuted.
It used to be that we honored our older generation and took pride in helping them live as good a life as possible, but anymore they are treated worse than animals in a lot of these nursing homes.
Please forgive me for writing so much, but if you ever have to place a loved one in a nursing home, please walk in there with eyes wide open and check them out from top to bottom.
I will go to my grave with this nightmare about how they treated my Mom even though I was there everyday. I couldn't be there 24 hours a day, but I did the best I could do.