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After finally figuring this guy out (6 yrs ago), it's taken almost 30 years to have the courage to file for divorce.
This has been abusive the whole time, but has escalated in the last 6 years. We had a beautiful home, and most people think he's the most idyllic man. But behind closed doors, it's been like living with Satan. He cleaned out my bank account ($7400) withoutt a word, then he says we talked about it. (??!!!) This is just one of a thousand hurtful things that's been done. FYI....Narcissists are Misnogynists as well. These people are pathological liars, and never admit to any wrong. Very denigrating, controlling, shaming......etc.
I finally figured that I can lose the home, and regain my self-respect and dignity. There's a lot of healing to do, as emotionally, it feels like being raped over and over.
The abuse has escalated since the filing, and he's threatened to call the police and have me thrown out of the home on some kind of lying charge that I physically hurt him. I'm having to stay with family for now, and out of the area, so not able to even work.I am finding gratitude again in small things in life, and my very supportive family and friends.
Karma will prevail in the end. And another factoid....Narcissists are never happy.
And being away has allowed me peace and healing. And getting to know myself and who I am. Getting my creativity back. Piece by piece, starting to love, accept and be kind to myself. Getting my boundaries back. Getting my SOUL back.
It's been a long road to try to forgive, but found some good advise about it. When people do hurtful things, it's NOT ABOUT YOU, and really not personal. IT'S ABOUT THEM. It allowed a major shift in me. That's a big healing, right there.
Even though I'm 62 yrs old, and have many regrets, I can see my part in this type of relationship. I am able to take responsibility for it and change my own co-dependency issues..... I look forward to living the rest of my life in peace, dignity and respect.
My new best song is 'Blackbird', by the Beatles.
Does this scenerio ring true to anyone?