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Just asking
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Love & Sex
Just asking
<font face="arial, helvetica, sans-serif" size="1"><div>Ask your peers for relationship advice (and, dare we say, sex tips too?) Singles and married couples are all welcome, just remember to keep it PG-13, folks.</div><div><br /></div></font>
anyone have suggestions on how to 'start again' after a really bad divorce and too many years hiding away from the world?
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Cat:8548aeff-cf8c-4e73-ad17-e0a4380e2232Forum:cc481351-a8cf-45e9-a794-9252b2280d38
Cat:8548aeff-cf8c-4e73-ad17-e0a4380e2232Forum:cc481351-a8cf-45e9-a794-9252b2280d38Discussion:9ff10ec0-5065-457d-8161-39fbf0cc565e
Forums » Relationships » Love & Sex » Just asking
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Re: Just asking
posted at November 25, 2011 8:27 PM EST
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Posts: 2
First: November 25, 2011 Last: December 19, 2011 |
Think of something you always wanted to learn or something you are interested in and join, volunteer or take a class. As you explore something that intrigues you and makes you light up inside, you will reconnect with yourself and the world. You'll meet other people with shared interests and they will have other people to introduce you to. Pretty soon you will find that you are no longer hiding from the world. You will find yourself stepping into a new life with energy and enthusiasm and that in and of itself is very attractive. |
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Re: Just asking
posted at November 25, 2011 9:28 PM EST
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Posts: 1
First: November 25, 2011 Last: November 25, 2011 |
In Response to Just asking: anyone have suggestions on how to 'start again' after a really bad divorce and too many years hiding away from the world? Posted by txcoral The suggestions given to me after the death of my hubby have been: church, join a seniors group, or check out eHarmony or Match.com (the free sites seem to be people looking for weekend sleepovers, etc) Wish I had a magic wand, I would wave it over both of us. Good luck...and if you find any good suggestions...pass them on to me! |
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Re: Just asking
posted at November 25, 2011 9:51 PM EST
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Posts: 1
First: November 25, 2011 Last: November 25, 2011 |
How do you tell someone that is very interested in you that you want to have the opportunity see others without hurting the relationship that you are forming? We are not exclusive yet but I think he wants to be. Some days I am very interested in this person and other days I want to keep my options open. I feel like I am not being truly honest with him. |
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Re: Just asking
posted at November 25, 2011 11:10 PM EST
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Posts: 1
First: November 25, 2011 Last: November 25, 2011 |
In Response to Re: Just asking: Think of something you always wanted to learn or something you are interested in and join, volunteer or take a class. As you explore something that intrigues you and makes you light up inside, you will reconnect with yourself and the world. You'll meet other people with shared interests and they will have other people to introduce you to. Pretty soon you will find that you are no longer hiding from the world. You will find yourself stepping into a new life with energy and enthusiasm and that in and of itself is very attractive. Posted by gnm282 It's almost easy to jump into the shallow waters of activity - for me a few of the things that interested me were starting genealogy (state and regional society meetings, Find-A-Grave picture-taker) and monthly library reading groups. What I have come away with is this... the more I contribute to others (kind and uplifting conversations, invitation to a quick lunch), the more I find myself not necessarily looking for that special person but rather the opportunity to be myself in a more delicate and receptive way that attracts men and women. I've come to believe that my daily life is being fulfilled in the random acts of saying hello or finding the moment to be of help at different places I go. Making strides to leave the house without the sweatpants and putting on a smile will make you feel good and you'll attract a good vibration from others. |
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Re: Just asking
posted at November 26, 2011 2:38 AM EST
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Posts: 1
First: November 26, 2011 Last: November 26, 2011 |
In Response to Re: Just asking: How do you tell someone that is very interested in you that you want to have the opportunity see others without hurting the relationship that you are forming? We are not exclusive yet but I think he wants to be. Some days I am very interested in this person and other days I want to keep my options open. I feel like I am not being truly honest with him. Posted by KathyLambert15 If the relationship is to him as it is to you,then you should be able to tell him that you want his friendship,as per dating and dinner and such,but not ready for the bed scene yet. If he is what you want him to be,he will understand and respect your wishes. If not,it is not meant to be. At least,not the way you want it.Going thru something similar right now. If you wish to talk further,I`ll be here. |
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Re: Just asking
posted at November 26, 2011 11:53 AM EST
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Posts: 2
First: October 8, 2011 Last: November 26, 2011 |
In Response to Re: Just asking: How do you tell someone that is very interested in you that you want to have the opportunity see others without hurting the relationship that you are forming? We are not exclusive yet but I think he wants to be. Some days I am very interested in this person and other days I want to keep my options open. I feel like I am not being truly honest with him. Posted by KathyLambert15 If you want to keep your options open, he is probably not what you're looking for. |
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Re: Just asking
posted at November 26, 2011 2:32 PM EST
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Posts: 2
First: November 26, 2011 Last: December 21, 2011 |
In Response to Re: Just asking: How do you tell someone that is very interested in you that you want to have the opportunity see others without hurting the relationship that you are forming? We are not exclusive yet but I think he wants to be. Some days I am very interested in this person and other days I want to keep my options open. I feel like I am not being truly honest with him. Posted by KathyLambert15 Honesty is a requirement for a real realationship! The telling part is the hardest and the only way is to just do it! I know this is hard to do. No one likes to deliver unplesant news. You want and deserve options denying them is unhealthy for you and harmfull to your someone. Certainly the consquences may be your biggest fear, losing that someone. |
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Re: Just asking
posted at November 27, 2011 2:07 PM EST
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Posts: 5
First: August 27, 2011 Last: December 12, 2011 |
In Response to Re: Just asking: [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Just asking : Honesty is a requirement for a real realationship! The telling part is the hardest and the only way is to just do it! I know this is hard to do. No one likes to deliver unplesant news. You want and deserve options denying them is unhealthy for you and harmfull to your someone. Certainly the consquences may be your biggest fear, losing that someone. I think Brian is pretty much right on with his response. But before you tell the guy how you feel, spend a little time rehearsing how you want to tell him, the words that you want to use. I have found that people have a much easier time after they carefully choose the words that sound ok to them beforehand. Don't wait too long, though...you are really not doing him any favors by waiting too long. |
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Re: Just asking
posted at November 27, 2011 8:42 PM EST
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Posts: 1
First: November 27, 2011 Last: November 27, 2011 |
In Response to Just asking: anyone have suggestions on how to 'start again' after a really bad divorce and too many years hiding away from the world? Posted by txcoral After the end of a 30-year marraige, I just concentrated on getting through one day at a time. I learned it was ok to talk about my sadness with friends and family. Talking usually started with tears and ended with laughter. Soon there was more laughter than tears. It just takes time. I was blessed to have a daughter's marriage and the birth of grandchildren help me move forward. Best of luck to you. Be patient with yourself and you will get to a better place. One other thing--the sadness seems worse at night and you'll feel better in the morning, although it can make for long nights. |
Forums » Relationships » Love & Sex » Just asking
