Fast Fixes for Consumer Complaints

By: Ron Burley | Source: AARP.org | July 29, 2009

I recently heard from a family trying to recover $51 that their deceased patriarch had been shorted on his Social Security check...almost a decade earlier. This 10-year odyssey reminded me of a column I wrote last year on how important it is to know when to give up on a consumer complaint, so you don’t spend great energy for a small reward.

I received quite a few responses to that column, most along the lines of “it’s the principle, not the money” or “it’s just not right to let someone get away with thievery.”

Actually, I agree. (My justice streak is long and wide.) I don’t think anyone has the right to cheat or steal. It’s just that, sometimes, the quest for restitution is more costly than the crime.

We’d probably all agree that spending more than a few seconds trying to retrieve 10 cents lost in a parking meter is not a good use of time. Most of us would also be in accord that a decade pursuing $51 is a bit too much time for the money. A good rule of thumb: If you don’t think you can solve a problem in as many minutes as there are dollars involved, it’s not worth pursuing.

So how do you get satisfaction quickly? Several years ago, I wrote “Unscrewed: The Consumer’s Guide to Getting What You Paid For,” an entire book on the subject of how to have your way with miscreant merchants without going to court or hiring a lawyer—both of which are too expensive and time-consuming. A couple of the techniques from the book can be useful in quickly recovering small amounts.

My favorite I call “Spokesperson for the Competition.” Instead of writing to the head of the company that is causing you problems, you write to the president of its toughest competitor, sharing your story of poor customer service and offering it as a marketing tool for their sales team. Here’s the trick: Before you send the letter to the competitor, first e-mail a copy to the company giving you problems, explaining that you are a loyal customer only looking for a fair deal. What any breathing businessperson will realize is that it would be much cheaper to take care of you than to battle your evidence of his own poor customer service in the hands of a free-market adversary. I’ve used this technique many times with great success. Writing and sending the letter typically takes less than half an hour.

The second technique I’ll share with you is “Town Crier.” Create a flyer on your computer that briefly—in two paragraphs—tells how you’ve been mistreated. Add a headline, something like “ABC Rentals Doesn’t Care.” Be careful not to accuse them of a crime, which could create legal issues. Just tell your story of poor customer service.

Print out a couple dozen of the flyers, go to the store, and ask for the manager. Politely inform the person that unless he or she “makes things right” with you that you’re going to stand on the public sidewalk (some sidewalks are private property) and do your civic duty to inform other potential customers of how badly you’ve been treated. (Notice that you’re not threatening to harm the company, merely trying to protect other shoppers.) Once again, most business operators will quickly realize that if you were to convince even a couple of people to go elsewhere, they’d lose more money than just taking care of you in the first place. I’ve also used this technique many times, and not once have I actually had to stand on a sidewalk passing out flyers. Total time invested? Probably an hour or two.

These are just a couple of the simple techniques that you can use to multiply your consumer leverage and get what you paid for. If you stay calm and carry yourself professionally, most business people will make cost-effective decisions—whether they like it or not.

Finally, even if you win the day, don’t expect an apology or admission of wrongdoing. The goal is to get your money’s worth. If you want to hear someone admit to being at fault, consider becoming a psychologist or a priest.

PS: Musician Dave Carroll recently took the town crier technique to a new level with his YouTube song, “United Breaks Guitars. ” Way to go, Dave. I think the song is very funny. However, unless you’re a gifted musician or comedian who can go viral on the Web, humiliating a company publicly will probably decrease your chances of getting your money back or problem solved. Once you’ve created the pain, you’ve lost your leverage.