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'My New Flame Has No Photos Around — Should I Worry?'

How to proceed when a person doesn't reveal his past

Romantic outing

Are you sexually in sync with your romantic partner? — Getty Images

Q: I'm dating a guy who doesn't display any photos of family or friends in his home. I find that odd — do you? What does it say about a person?

A: In this day and age, it may well mean that all his photos — of family, friends and more — are on his smartphone. Or it may simply mean he is unsentimental. Or perhaps he just finished reading The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up and has decided to live in a clutter-free environment.

Unless you are getting other signals that he may not be who he says he is, I wouldn't worry where the family portraits are.

Q: My same-sex partner and I, now 65 and 72, are out of sync. She more frequently initiated sex in our younger years, but if anything is going to happen nowadays, it's up to me. She says her sex drive is gone, but I want to be sexual into our future. How can we enhance our sex life?

A: You're the more interested partner, so it's your turn to be the seductress. Get your partner back in the mood by showing her how much you desire her. To do this, take sex out of the mundane: Create magical moments — backdrops for romance that woo her and remind her what the two of you are capable of together.

Age doesn't eliminate passion, but doing things the same "old" way may dull it. When you think of sex as a lifetime gift, it makes sense that it shouldn't have an expiration date. But some balance in your relationship has clearly shifted, so it's now up to you to take the lead — and save your sex life.


Got a question for Dr. Pepper Schwartz about dating, love, relationships or sex? Send it to TheNakedTruth@aarp.org.


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