When Stress Gets the Best of You
By: Source: AARP.org Date Posted: 2003-11-01 00:00:00-05:00
Major life changes — retiring, losing a job or loved one, getting sick, or going through a divorce — can cause tremendous stress. So can the pressures of everyday living — raising children or grandchildren, dealing with a difficult coworker, or commuting in heavy traffic.
Sometimes stress goes away with whatever was causing it — like a project deadline. But some people live with stress for a very long time. They shouldn't. Prolonged stress can sap your energy, cause headaches, backaches, and stomach upsets, and make you unhappy. It could lead to anxiety and depression. It can disrupt normal activities like eating and sleeping. And it could make you sick.
So how do you know when stress has gotten the best of you? Maybe you think you can handle your stress. Or that it will pass. Many times, it does. Other times, talking to someone can help.
The American Psychological Association recommends you seek professional help for stress if:
- You feel trapped.
- You worry all the time and can't concentrate.
- The way you feel affects your daily life — sleep, eating habits, job, relationships.
Where To Turn
For some people, confiding in a spouse or partner, trusted friend, or family member can help them feel better. A priest, minister, rabbi, or other spiritual leader can also provide an emotional outlet. Some employers offer counseling through Employee Assistance Programs. Or there might be community resources you can turn to, such as support groups, hotlines, or classes and workshops on managing or dealing with stress.
If your efforts aren't helping you feel better, or you're starting to feel as though you're stressed out over everything all the time or your life is getting out of control, see a mental health professional.
You might know it's time if you:
- Often have trouble controlling your emotions
- Have trouble coping with things, even situations that aren't major
- Get panic attacks, including a racing heart and sweating palms
- Feel you're in a constant state of turmoil.
Social workers, family counselors or therapists, psychologists, and psychiatrists are among the trained mental health providers who can help you cope with stress. Peer support groups can also help.
Ask a friend, neighbor, or your family care doctor to recommend a mental health professional. You also can check the telephone book under counseling, marriage, family, or mental health services. You can ask your insurance company for a list of mental health professionals whose services are covered under your health plan.
Treatment Approaches
There are a number of ways a mental health professional might try to help you feel better. The following might be done alone or together with each other or some different approach:
- "Talk therapy" (learning to identify what causes you stress and how to change the way you respond to it by replacing old habits and responses with new ones)
- Learning relaxation techniques, such as meditation or deep breathing
- Learning coping strategies
- Keeping a stress journal and discussing it with your counselor
Unchecked stress can take the joy out of living and a toll on your physical health. Get a handle on stress and feel better, mind and body.
AARP Resources
Handling Stress
Get control of your stress before it controls you.
Yoga Yields Mind and Body Fitness
Yoga is among the many relaxation techniques people use to de-stress and has other great benefits, too.
Emotional Health
AARP's Life After Loss program talks about handling the stress of grief.
Depression is Treatable
Close to 19 million people each year deal with depression but it does respond to treatment.
Additional Resources
Natural Stress Remedies
WholeHealthMD offers information on vitamins and other nutrition supplements to relieve stress.
Stress Early Warning Signs
Learn the early warning signs and other indicators of stress.
Stress Management Briefs
The University of Minnesota offers a series of stress management briefs that include information on recognizing stress signals, stress vulnerability, and beating the blues.
Books
Find these books online at Barnes & Noble.com.
Treating Anxiety and Stress: A Group Psycho-Educational Approach Using Brief CBT
Jim White, Wiley, John & Sons, Incorporated, August 2000
Stress Response Syndromes: Personality Styles and Interventions, Fourth Edition
Mardi Jon Horowitz, Jason Aronson Publishers, June 2001






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