Support Groups for Grandparents
If you're raising a grandchild, look around for a support group. Many cities and towns have support groups for grandparents who are raising their grandchildren. If you find one, join it today. It may change your life.
Support groups aren't "pity parties." These grandparents don't sit around feeling sorry for themselves. They work together to make things better. A support group lets you meet other people who are going through the same thing you are. You talk about how you feel. You find out how other people learned how to cope with their new responsibilities. And, you get practical information that can help you and your grandchild.
Many support groups have babysitting during their meetings. Some groups work with local agencies so members can easily get the services they need. Most groups invite local experts to talk to members about issues that are important to them.
Finding a Support Group
Start with the AARP national database of support groups for grandparents and grandchildren. It's searchable by zip code or state and may be able to lead you to a group right in your area.
You can also contact local agencies to find out about support groups. Your area agency on aging may know about groups. Call your grandchild's school. Check with local churches. Contact the department of social services. Any agency that works with adults, families or children should be able to help you.
Starting a Group
If you can't find a support group nearby, why not start one? It's not that hard. You can start a support group with only two or three people
First, you have to do a little research. Learn more about support groups by talking to people who are already in a self-help group. Attend a meeting of a support group. Watch what goes on there. Read about groups – online and in books. Ask questions. Borrow ideas.
Next, find a good place to meet. The place you pick should be safe. It should be easy to get to. This could be someone's home. It could be a church, synagogue, or mosque. It might be a library, community center or hospital. Think about asking a social service agency to sponsor your group. Then you could meet at the agency's office. And group members could use the agency's services.
You can't have a support group without grandparents. But where will you find them? Ask your local school or church to tell you about grandparents who are raising their grandchildren. Get names from social service agencies in town. Put up posters and flyers. Send notices to the local paper. See if you can get a radio station to give your group a free plug. Remember you only need two or three others.
Running a Meeting
Keep the first meeting simple. Start by sharing your story. Invite others to do the same. But don't force anyone to speak. Make sure members understand that anything discussed in the group cannot be discussed with others outside the group.
Make sure that the entire group makes decisions about how the group will be run. Group members need to decide how long each meeting will be. They should have a say on where to meet, and how often. You will want to meet at least once a month. Some members may want to meet more often.
Do what you can to make sure all members of the support group can attend every meeting. Provide child care during meetings. Find a way to give members a ride to meetings if they need one. More members may attend if the group meets in the evening or on weekends.
Group members should also decide what the purpose of the group will be. Who will be able to join? What kind of activities will the group sponsor? Will you have programs for children and teens? Does your group want to have guest speakers? What topics should the speakers talk about?
Ask members to take turns planning and running the meetings. Ask them to take turns bringing refreshments, too. Let members exchange telephone numbers so they can talk with one another between meetings. Set up a phone tree so members can help to spread the word to one another when there is an emergency.
A Final Word
Raising a grandchild can be challenging. We all know that. But it also can be rewarding. Your support group can help you meet the challenges you face. Make sure it also helps you celebrate the triumphs and the rewards of what you do!
AARP Resources
AARP National Support Groups Database
Find a grandparent support group in your area by logging onto
AARP's database of support groups.
Kinship
Care Fact Sheets
AARP and several of its partners have compiled fact sheets for
each state that include Census data on grandparent caregivers and
information on resources and services, state policies, public
benefit programs, and state kinship care laws.
Other Resources
Brookdale
Foundation Group
The Foundation's seed grant program provides funds to
community and state agencies to start up support groups.
GrandsPlace
GrandsPlace offers daytime and evening online support groups for
grandparents raising grandchildren.
Starting
a New Self Help Group
The American Self-Help Group Clearninghouse offers advice on
beginning a group.
Books
Find these books online at Barnes & Noble.com
"The Support Group Sourcebook: What They Are, How You Can Find One, and How They Can Help You," Linda L. Klein, Wiley, John & Sons, Incorporated, 2000.
