And what of Linda Gray's Sue Ellen, J.R.'s long-suffering ex-wife? Mama is all about helping her boy, and tells John Ross straightaway that her political connections might come in handy. Indeed. She's about to run for governor, y'all. And she's the sole underwriter of Elena's oil exploration project. Oh, what a tangled web.

Bobby's wife of seven years is Ann (Brenda Strong, also of Desperate Housewives), a new character for this show. She's smart and sensible, a tower of strength for Bobby. But she has a secret. Of course she has a secret.

Dallas devotees can also look forward to appearances by familiar faces from the first run, such as Ken Kercheval as Cliff Barnes, Charlene Tilton as Lucy Ewing, and Steve Kanaly as Ray Krebbs. Of course, fans have been asking about Bobby's first wife, Pam (Victoria Principal). At the end of the original series, Pam survived a fiery crash with a tanker truck — only to be told by doctors that she had only a year to live. In the real world, she presumably would have met her mortal end well before the new century.

But this is Dallas, a universe in which Pam once famously dreamed away an entire season just to erase the writers' bad-idea death of dear Bobby. Rumors of a Victoria Principal appearance have been all over the Internet. Sure, it would be nice to see Pam again, but trust me — once you're engrossed in all these boot-stompin' new storylines, you won't be missing her.

Just hold on tight.

You may also like: Bill Newcott's Entertainment Blog: Spinning Soaps on the Web.