The journal of my life began sixty years go. It began with difficulties because my mother and I were on the edge of dying and there was my father enduring the pain for us but his actions of bravery and love for my mother and me saved our lives. I was a joy in their lives, and soon after, the joy of my brothers and sisters. My father and mother taught us the love of life to live from the being of our lives. We learn to endure the struggles with them as we grow up. It was their hard work that when we set on the table for every meal was happiness, we sheared our stories, it was noise, but also fun. They taught us their values as we grow up and for some of us until the end of their lives. Although, they knew in one point in their life that some how our value had been lost. I could tell in my father eyes after many year I had not see him that our family was in trouble, he told me to set down near him and I set as a little girl that once I was for him. I felt that love that I had just lost and found it again. I stay for a short time and live for an other state, I had to say goodbye to him, I felt the pain see his eyes full of tears and it was the last time that I saw him alive.  

Years pass and each of us, brothers and sisters, took a different path of life. I married a man that I loved and enjoyed life together. After five years, we felt the need to fill our love with new lives on earth, our three sons. We watch our sons growing and then death came along and I was alone watching my sons becoming men. It was a tough time and we pull it through. Now, each of them is on their own path of life, and when they come and see me I ask them to stay with me little more, but they do live. They have their life to live and I must continue to live my life even though is so lonely.

I no long do I share that big table with my brothers and sisters; indeed, we have became strangers brothers and sisters. The love and value of our family have been lost; I am searching for that love again. Why do I am sharing this writing with AARP community, I do not know.

Maria