It seems the older I get, the more 'I hear voices' from my past.  For some people 'hearing voices' might seem a bit weird and I am sure they could be.  Thus far mine have come over the cell or house phone. 

Early in the morning, before the school bus had run, one day last week, I received a call from a special, special person who left a message with all her phone numbers. Don't you love those people who are courteous enough to leave a message? I am always a little anxious about calling back a number, an unknown umber and especially an unknown number with an out of the area code number. Who knows who it might be, a bill collector, a telemarketer, the Reader's Digest Sweepstakes person.  So I don't usually return calls from my caller ID info. I digress,which is something I love doing. My son, who was a little boy when we first came to know Vera, had heard the messase come on the answering machine. He told me there was a message on the machine that he was sure I would want to hear.  I hurried to the phone listened to the message and jotted the numbers down and called her back. When she answered  the phone, she wanted immediately to know about Norris, my husband. It seems she had a dream about him with an unhappy ending. I was happy to tell her that he was doing just fine. 'The fact is' I said,  'I think he had some of those rabbit batteries installed when they did open heart on him the year after he retired, because he never seems to stop.' Once she knew he was alive and well we began to catch up partially on the last 20+ years. I am sure it will take more time on FB, Twit, e mails and phone calls and maybe a visit so I can sit on her wrap around porch. 

This person came into my life when I was in my early 40's. I was the special education director's administrative aide at our local school system. This young lady just out of college, had come to be one of our teachers to teach elementary students who had learning disabilities. Being the mother-type since the age of 12, I immediately took her under my wing. Having had 3 younger sisters that I mothered it was a natural thing to do. And beside she was so tiny and petite and I am so tall and lanky I felt as if I had one of my little sisters plunked in my lap. I loved and appreciated her upbeat, enthusiastic ways. Her ability to be positive when everyone else had their thumbs turned down, way down, about some kid. She was bright and funny and very creative. I did have a little problem with her the first time I took her to a store on Main Street in our little community. She bounced out of the car and we were almost in the store when I looked down and realized she was shoeless. I stopped there on the sidewalk and talked with her about the impression a new teacher should make and that putting her shoes on might be a very important help on the first impression thing. It was difficult to keep my most serious 'mother' face on. But sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do and keep a straight face. After all these years when I think of that moment, I giggle out loud. She was totally unconcerned about what people might think of her. To her it was a natural thing to go barefoot anywhere, anytime. She complied with my suggestion and returned to the car, dug her shoes out from under the seat and slipped them on.  

I am looking forward to getting reacquainted with this lovely child-woman. I do hope that she has been able to go barefoot most of her life. I hope that her closet has not been taken over by multiple pairs of shoes like so many women have allowed to happen in their lives. From what she has told me she no longer works with children in a teacher capacity, but test students individually. I know she does a great job. I can hear her patient, endearing voice, encouraging and putting at ease even the most anxious student.

Yes, I am looking forward to getting to know, again this delightful voice from my past.

     Jesus said: "I am the Way, the Truth, and the Life; no man cometh unto the Father but by Me. John 14:6

    Neither is there salvation in any other; for there is none other Name under heaven given among men, whereby we must be saved.  Acts 4:12

    How clear and concise: there should be neither confusion nor contradiction. There are many names under heaven in which we can find religion; but salvation can be found in one only.  All have sinned  Romans 3:23. All need a Saviour: For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is  eternal life In Jesus Christ our Lord.   Romans 6:23.  At Calvary He paid sin's awful penalty for all who will accept Him; but His death there was not to give men a religion; if was to provide Salvation.

   There is no salvatrion in priests; penance or prayers; but only in Christ. Service and sacraments, churches and charities, tears and treasure, ritual and reformation - A L L are alike helpless to save.

   Men are willing to give assent in their heads to the claims of Christianity; while refusing to accept in their hearts the Christ of Christianity.

  Men are willing to take the high place in the work and ritual of the church; while refusing to take the low place of guilty sinners needing a sinner's Saviour.   

Men are willing to believe in the moral precepts of God's Word, as based on the Commandments; while refusing to believe in, rest on, and receive God's Son as Saviour of their souls, because of His finished work in their behalf at Calvary.

   Religion is the improvement of the old nature through respect for lofty principles.  Salvation is the imparting of a new nature through receiving a Lowly Person. As many as received HIM to them gave HE power to become the sons of God. John 1:12.

   Religion clothes us with the robes of our own righteousness, which God says are as filthy rags. Isaiah 64:6  Salvation clothes us in the perect righteousness of Christ, which alone can make us acceptable in the sight of God.

  Not by works of righteousness which we have done but according to His Mercy He saved us. Titus  3:5

   Religion is what man does for God. Salvation is what God does for man. Isiah 53:6

   Religion says, Something in my hand I bring. Salvation says, Nothing in my hand I bring. Ephesians 2:8, 9.

   Religion is trusting in a work we do. Salvation is trusting in a work that has been done. Matthew 26:28.

   Religion depends on our behaving. Salvation depends on our believeing. Acts 16:31.

   Religion says we must act our best. Salvation says we must accept God's best. John 3:16 and John 3:36.

   Religion depends on the sufficiency of character. Salvation depends on the Sacrifice of the Cross. 1 Corinthians 1:18.

   Religions tries to furnish a sacrifice. Salvation trusts in a finished sacrifice. John 19:30

   Religions is striving for a better attainment. Salvation is secured through, a perfect atonement. 1 Peter 1:18, 19.

   Religion tries to bring us from darkness to light . Salvation DOES bring us from Death unto Life. John 5:24

   Religions says we must be found in God's house. Salvation says we must be found in HIM, not having our own righteouness which is of the law, but that which is through the faith of Christ. Phillipians 3:9.

Gospel Tract Society, Inc., P. O. Box 1118, Independence, MO 64051

There stands a door in the east side of heaven

And there our blessed Lord does wait

HE is coming soon to take us all to heaven

Oh, maybe it will be today!

HE came first a babe in a manager

HE traveled to dark calvary

They laid HIM dead in a grave

But HE came out to rescue us.

Today there stands a door in the evil heart of mankind

And there HIS spirit knocks today

If you should hear HIS voice oh, sinner

Just let HIM in don't turn HIM away.

Just let HIM in don't turn HIM away.

In the spring of 1971, God sent a missionary team (husband and wife) home from Peru for a year's sabbatical. They visited the small church I was attending. The wife asked if I would like to attend a Child Evangelism class with her the next morning. I said sure I would go. I remember the class was being held at a local church (much larger than the one I attended). The teacher was teaching teachers. These teachers were all volunteers. They opened their homes each week and invited the neighbor children to attend a Good News Club. They used a flannel graph board to display the Bible story on. Not only were they teaching Bible stories to children, they were helping the children to memorize scriptures each week. The missionaries planned to do the same thing while they were home on leave. I began to think what a great way to teach children in my neighbor.

The teacher was explaining to the teachers to always weave the 6 points of the gospel into each Bible story. I was very excited,  but when she said 6 points I was very uncertain about whether I could do this or not. I had lost a great portion of my memory bank and I was having trouble taking in new information. But God showed me that the word Gospel has 6 letters and then He showed me to take each letter and put a point of the gospel beside it.

G     od so loved us that HE sent HIS

O    nly begotten Son into the world. Because we, each of us, all of us, have been cursed with a deadly disease

S    in. It began with Adam and has been passed down to each of us.  But through the

P    recious blood of Jesus Christ we can be cleansed and forgiven and freed from this curse of Sin and through the

E   ternal resurrection of Jesus Christ we can have Life eternal.  If we will

L   et HIM, Jesus Christ in to our lives.

Now this may seem too simple to many people. And I confess it seemed too simple to me. But this is exactly what happened to me. I spent years trying to improve my old nature and failing and failing. God's love was not enough to save me from this deadly disease Sin (the penalty for sin is death).  His love for me and you motivated HIM to send HIS son to the this earth. God demands perfection and He provided it in HIS son.  Jesus Christ was born of a virgin, lived a sinless life, but HIS life lived on this earth cannot save us from this deadly disease, SIN. HE went to a cross prepared for HIM. As a lamb to the slaugther and there HE poured out his blood, his life as the only acceptable sacrifice for this deadly disease, SIN. They laid HIM dead in a grave...But HE came out to rescue us...When HE came up out of that grave HE provided salvation, redemption, healing for the deadly disease of SIN. to everyone who will let Him into their lives. HIS Holy Spirit knocks at the door of the heart of mankind at this moment. He desires to come in present you with Eternal Life...Jesus Christ.  Will you let HIM in? 

     The young couple had taken in an expectant mother. A beautiful retriver. When the puppies were born I spied a golden colored one in the litter. When I asked what they planned to do with the puppies, they answered by asking a question. Would I like one of the puppies? I asked how much for the pretty little one there?  They said 'free' or is that too much? Are you kidding? They told me they would call me when it was time to for me to pick her up.

     The problem now was how to tell my husband that I had impulsively chosen a puppy from a litter being weaned very soon. We had agreed when the  poodle "Maggie" had left us not to get another dog. Maggie was perfect for us  she was an inside dog, well-trained and never barked. But I had agreed to take a puppy, a golden retriver. Of course, she was free, that might just be the ticket in getting a 'well, okay.'

     We had never had a yellow dog...brown, black, white, spotted, even a red Irish setter and black spotted St. Bernard, but never a yellow dog. What had caused me to fall in love with this little rooting rootie dog? A yellow one at that. Out from those memories that we often hideway in that locked closet in our heart there came the flash of a memory of  a yellow dog.

     When I completed the 11th grade of high school my parents decided to sell the farm.  This humble farm had been home to us for as long as I could remember.  It was a great source of security to me. No one could take it from us because my parents had been given a deed to the property. My paternal grandfather was a farmer and real estate investor. He had managed to provide each of his 5 children with a home and acreage. Though he died before I ever knew him, his success in real estate caused me to have a lifelong interest in the real estate market. 

     My parents planned to move to the town where we lived during the summer. They would buy a farm and live there year round. Since I would be changing schools in my senior year I wrote to the school to make sure I had credits that were transferrable. The response was that they did not offer DCT (Diversified Career Training). Therefore, I would not have enough credits to graduate since those credits were not acceptable. I had taken this course because it allowed me to attend classes in the morning and work in the afternoon. If I moved with my parents and five little brothers and sisters I would not be able to finish school on time. I would also have to give up the job that provided money for me to be able to finish school.

     I knew if I moved with my parents I would probably never return to school and just drop out. I had 4 older brothers and sisters. My oldest sister had finished high school and gone on to become a registered nurse. My oldest brother had dropped out of school, worked for awhile and then entered the Navy. Another sister had dropped out of school and married and another brother had dropped out of school at the age of 16 and hired out on a dredge boat. He was determined to be the captain of the dredge boat by the age of 21.  He made it at the age of 20.  They were all rooting for me to finish high school and encouraged me not to give up.

     My parents realized the dilemna they had put me in. The problem was where would I live if I stayed. It was decided I would go to live with my maternal grandparents. I had spent a week here and there with them as I was growing up. Growing up in a large family and because in that era you didn't ask for special favors. I hesitated about asking to be allowed to bring my 'yellow' dog with me. But I asked. My parents and grandparents approved my taking 'yellow dog' with me. My parents moved and my dog and I moved.

     When I was 12, my father was diagnosed with cancer. I was the oldest child still at home. I remember my mother talking quietly to me when my father was in the hospital receiving surgery and radium treatment. She told me I might have to help her raise my little brothers and sisters. I promised her I would. Now at the age of 17 I was separated from those I had promised to help watch over. What might happen to them?  I missed them dreadfully. And was my nature I worried and fretted that I was not there with them. Saying nighttime prayers, helping with their homework and loving them. I am sure I missed them much more than they missed me. I was a rather bossy older sister.

    I often wonder why children bring such joy to my life. I still enjoy going outside and playing their games with them. I enjoy sitting and playing board games or putting together legos. I just enjoy being with children. Could ir have been that early responsibility that caused me to realize the importance of little ones.

     It was so lonely at my grandparents.  My grandparents did not talk very much. They did not talk to each other.  It was a silent house. They were up with the chickens and in bed at dark. An aunt and uncle and younger cousin lived a mile away. They helped me get from June to January. Sometimes when I could not bear it any longer yellow dog and I would walk to their house. My aunt, by marriage, and I say that because she wan't really related to me. It seemed strange though we were not related she was kinder to me than my grandparents. She would fix french fries for me and my yellow dog. Several times after I became an adult I attempted to express my thankfulness to her.

    Cousin and I spent many Sunday afternoons out in the pasture playing ball. He was younger than me, but that was not important. He was a substitute for those little ones that I missed so much. After I became an adult I came to know he was having his own sorrows at that time. Maybe we helped each other.

    My yellow dog adjusted well. There were other animals and she was not alone.  My grandmother had her cats which she fed pancakes and syrup to every morning. My grandfather had his dog who had, had puppies. I watched him bob their tails with a hatchet on the back porch one Sunday afternoon. Yes, yellow dog was adjusting very well. She was there every morning when I left for work that summer. She was there when I returned every afternoon. She and I had long hours of playing and talking. She was helping me get through the lonely times. I knew that I was having problems adjusting to my new environment. But I knew the goal I had set could only be completed by staying where I was.

     One afternoon I came home from work and my mother had been by to see my grandparents that day. For some reason which to this day I do not know...my mother took my yellow dog home with her. No, she was not bringing her back. Why would my mother do this to me? It was summer I had my job each day, but I had no contact with anyone except my silent grandparents, my aunt and uncle and my cousin. Didn't she realize how very lonely I was?  She never explained why she had taken my dog. I made a vow that day if ever I had a home of my own I would have a dog and no one would take that dog away from me. 

     Was it possible my longing for the yellow dog had lain dormant all these years. As I began to think on all those other dogs....they were dogs for the children and the poodle really been for my husband after his open heart surgery. Was it possible I was finally keeping my promise to myself?

Wanting to see that smile one more time

To hear their voice again on the telephone

To catch the laughter that began in their eyes

To see them thrilled with surprise.

Knowing it won't happen again

No matter how much your heart longs

For those days now gone by

But longing, missing and wanting causes your heart to cry

Gratefulness instead must fill my heart 

That they were once part of my life

When longing, missing, wanting creeps up on me

I will tell my heart you must be grateful and wait.

Please let me explain that it is not stolen. 

Many years ago when my husband worked on the road and was gone quite a bit and there were no children at home I began attending the Episcopal church.  One of my  friends was a member and she told me there was an early service which I could attend and still make services at my church. She warned me not to look for her there. She preferred the later service. What drew me was the church where the Episcopal services were held. It is located in the historical district  and had formerly been a Catholic Church. The Catholic Church now had a building farther out in the county.  I kept driving by the church and admiring the building and wanting to see inside.   

Since we have always attended a Southern Baptist Church, I thought it best not to share my intentions with my husband.  Finally the decision was made to attend the first Sunday my husband was out of town I got up quite early (SBC services start at 11:00). Was dressed and ready to leave the house at 7:30. Having had 2 Catholic friends in my lifetime I wasn't sure if you were suppose to eat before attending an Episcopal service.  To be on the safe side I skipped breakfast. I arrived at the church and went in alone. I sat at the back of the church so I could observe everything that went on. It was so quite and peaceful and the people were so reverent. I was stunned. If you have never attended a Southern Baptist Church service let me just say it is much like a huge friendly family reunion, without the food. Everyone is talking, laughing and having a great time visiting.  Of course when the service begins we get quiet and some listen and some fall asleep about 11:40. I say this so you will understand why I am so stunned by the pre-worship time in this lovely church. 

It seemed everyone brought their own hymnal so my neighbor shared hers with me. The music was soothing. Then prayers were read from the prayer book. There was a prayer book in the back of the pew in front of me. I pulled the hard cover book out and was amazed at how small and compact it was. As we began to read the prayers I felt this covetous feeling overtaking me. I wanted that prayer book. I was considering taking it home with me. I was totally shocked at myself. Taking salt shakers from a restaurant when I was a teen-ager was one thing, but to take a prayer book from a church. What was wrong with me? I overcame the feeling and carefully returned the prayer book to is rightful place.

I attended the services at this church for many Sundays and was always blessed.  I always carefully returned the prayer book to the back of the pew in front of me. However, I never forgot how much I loved that prayer book.

Recently thru my business I have met a most delightful family and they attend this Episcopal Church. They are such sweet wonderful people I felt safe in admitting my struggle over the prayer book in their church. When I arrived at the Children's Theater tonight (which they own and direct), three (they havea total of six children)of their small children came bringing a lovely wrapped gift. When I opened the gift, there it was a prayer book all my own and not stolen.

      A new property has come on the real estate market and I must preview it for a prospective purchaser. My husband has agreed to ride with me out in the country to this isolated vacant house, surrounded by 65 acres of woods. The directions indicate that we are to turn on a dirt road just before the small bridge and we do. We end up in a huge field being made ready for planting. We manage to turn around without getting stuck and head back out the way we came in. We decide maybe what we thought was a bridge isn't really a bridge. We travel on and finally there is a bridge. We turn on the first dirt road before this real bridge. There!  just off to the right in the talll Georgia pine trees sits the house.     

     The house was once a frame farm house. Someone has applied a beautiful stucco finish over the wood siding. The exterior now looks like brick.  We wander in and discover a house of many rooms, hardwood floors, a huge kitchen, but only one bath. It is definitely not your vaulted ceilings, recessed lights, walk in closets, spa bathroom house. But there is something familiar and charming about the house. The feeling causes us to stop and ponder and begin the 'what if" game. What if  this wall was removed, and this unused door was closed off and  this great space was turned into a second bath. 

     We walk out on the little back stoop and survey the back yard which backs up to a pine forest. The sun warms us from the chill of the empty house, as we meander in the huge yard. We notice the chicken coop which will need a new door. We puzzle about how they get chickens at the chicken farms to lay two eggs a day instead of just one. We wander apart each thinking our own thoughts. The quiet peaceful surroundings causes me to think of the garden where God walked with Adam and Eve. My heart breathes a prayer, "God, please come walk with us."

I had a breakfast meeting to attend on one of the islands at a magnificent hotel. It is a monthly routine and I had almost decided not to attend until I discovered my son and daughter-in-law would be staying at the hotel for a few days where the meeting was being held. We made arrangements to meet after my meeting.

This was my first look see of what the ’staying’ guests are offered. Wow! I felt like little Goldilocks when I laid down on one of the two beds in the giant-sized room. It was definitely a Mama Bear bed. Their room had a view of the water. The ground floor room gave us easy access to the beautiful beach. After the early morning rain the sun had come out and  enhanced the walk my son took us on showing us the pool area, no I should pool(s) area. The 4 pools each were of a different size and shape and a different setting for each one. My son pointed out the sign which said no diving from the rocks or bridge. The bridge crossed the pool and the huge rocks were used to make waterfalls into the pool. He remarked, If we had been brought here as children we would have been thrown out. He is the oldest of 4 sons. I agreed that was a true statement. I suppose children still do things like my sons did or they would not have had that sign up.  

Returning home we crossed the long, high suspended bridge. At the top, the view of the water, marshes, bits of sandbars glistened in the sunlight and we were filled with awe and wonder.

I had a breakfast meeting to attend on one of the islands at a magnificent hotel. It is a monthly routine and I had almost decided not to attend until I discovered my son and daughter-in-law would be staying at the hotel for a few days where the meeting was being held. We made arrangements to meet after my meeting.

This was my first look see of what the ’staying’ guests are offered. Wow! I felt like little Goldilocks when I laid down on one of the two beds in the giant-sized room. It was definitely a Mama Bear bed. Their room had a view of the water. The ground floor room gave us easy access to the beautiful beach. After the early morning rain the sun had come out and  enhanced the walk my son took us on showing us the pool area, no I should pool(s) area. The 4 pools each were of a different size and shape and a different setting for each one. My son pointed out the sign which said no diving from the rocks or bridge. The bridge crossed the pool and the huge rocks were used to make waterfalls into the pool. He remarked, If we had been brought here as children we would have been thrown out. He is the oldest of 4 sons. I agreed that was a true statement. I suppose children still do things like my sons did or they would not have had that sign up.  

Returning home we crossed the long, high suspended bridge. At the top, the view of the water, marshes, bits of sandbars glistened in the sunlight and we were filled with awe and wonder.