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I meet a lot of people online, as well as other places, admittedly, most are men.  At any rate, it never fails that during the conversation, after going to great lengths to "explain" their particular situation, a man will say, "it is what it is".  This is said as if they have absolutely no control over their circumstances whatsoever and you (in this case me) may as well accept it.  I have a problem with this attitude.  I feel, we all have some say, and responsibility for our circumstances, be them good or bad.  For instance; if a man tells me, that his ex-wife has him by the short hairs in some obscure way, because of circumstances surrounding the events leading up to their break-up and/or subsequent separation or divorce, naturally I begin to wonder what part they played in those events.  And if there was something they could have done then or can do now to change the way things are.  Saying "it is what it is" to me is a cop out.  I say it's a cop out, because I feel that is accepting a situation or circumstance without even trying to improve it or that you have simply given up, in which case makes me wonder what else in life has this person given up on.  Or, worse yet, what might this person submit to, give in to, or give up on in relation to our interactions or relationship.  I may expect too much from a person or a man but one thing I do expect, from all people is that they fight for themselves and against any injustice put upon them by any other person or establishment.  I realize that things sometimes happen that are beyond our control and that sometimes you can fight until you have exhausted all possibilities and still lose but I find, that when "it is what it is" is spoken, it is usually regarding an incident that can and in most instances actually should be corrected.  

Just something that was on my mind, food for thought you might say.