I was never a heavy smoker, but when I wanted to quit, and would get the urge, I would always have a book handy.

When I got the urge, instead,, I would read a chapter in my book, and forget the urge. But of course, I did read quite a few books!!! But... I no longer smoke!

I have been thinking of you and wondering how you are doing.  I understand that releaving addiction comes in '3's' - three days, three weeks, 3 months, etc.  Just don't quit; keep going....

Hi From Jane!

I am giving a shout for you!  You are doing a great job.  Twenty-five years of quitting.  10th Day!  Whahooooooo!

Hang tough!  Don't let mess up your path!

Looking forward to sharing when you return.

Thank you, Jane.  I appreciate your encouragement.  I have passed the ten day mark, which is the best I've done in 25 years of trying to quit.  My major impediment has been an extremely serious panic disorder, which is, as far as I can tell, genetic, affecting every woman in my maternal line.  I have never been willing to accept the medication that takes me where 40 years of breathing exercises, yoga, exercise, therapy, meditation, visualization, and affirmations have never been able to take me.  This time I am taking the medication, and it doesn't stop the anxiety, but it does stop the panic and allow me to use the other tools I have learned.  I feel pretty sure that the struggle isn't over, and, like you, I have a close friend who is sabotaging me without even recognizing what she is doing.  I am, unfortunately, about to take a trip to see her, because I must confront her about that... and several less pleasant things.  It's likely to end the friendship, which is 36 years old.  If I could put it off, I would... but now is the time.  Meanwhile, I have a wonderful psychiatric nurse prescriber who supports me 100%, several wonderful friends who do the same, and two beloved cats who really want me to be happy.  I will also have, on my trip, the company of some good audiobooks and some peace and quiet, which I never get at my job... and I will be stopping to see another friend who is wonderfully kind and supportive.  And that will be very good.  Keep sending good thoughts, and accept my thanks for them.

And thanks for joining the group.  I hope it will become a place where we can all come and share our dreams in safety and mutual support, with everyone's creativity working together.  Because I won't be near a computer much between 10/28 and 11/8, I trust to the group to keep it going.

Lucina

Help With Stopped Smoking:

I quit smoking about 24 years ago.  I  will not label myself as addictive, because then I believe I am such a person.  But I had the strong tendency to hook into certain drugs, food regimens, exercise regimens, cleaning regimens, etc.

It took me about 80 times to quit smoking.  It took a few years.  One weekend, I finally realized that I was very sick.  I was 36 years old at the time.  I realized that I was not attending to my sickness with cigarrettes.  I turned the phone off on a Friday night and told my family I was going to bed for the weekend.  And that is what I did.  I did not get up till Monday morning.  I only got up to go the bathroom, bath, and eat or drink.  I kept the bedroom door closed.  It was one of the first times in my life that I really turned toward loving myself.  It was very painful.

I ate myself silly that weekend.  I watched t.v. from bed, ate and ate, and slept.  On Monday morning, I got up with this bloated stomach.  I was spacey in my head.  I never picked up a cigarrette after that.  And my then spouse smoked like a chimney.  He did not respect my quitting.  He continue to smoke non-stop in my face.  I cross addicted.  I started jogging 6-12 miles a day.  I did this for about a decade.  Stopping smoking is inner journey work.  It is self discovery.  It is Path!  It is a process that requires you to let go of how you should be. 

During this era, I had a close friend that undermined my effort to quit.  She was a very together kind of person.  Neat.  Dressed well.  Spoke well.  Marvelous gal.  She smoked.  Whenever I tried to quit, she would tell me she likes me better when I smoke, because my personality changed.  The weekend I went to bed to quit smoking was the weekend I gave up this friend. 

Nobody will ever love you like you can.  You are on the greatest journey now...caring for yourself.

The Journey to My Self is the best trip I have ever taken.  Go slow.  Take time for yourself.  Consider letting go of helping others for some time until you are feeling better.   If you are able, take long walks.  Most importantly, be less than perfect.  I wish you the best!  May those horrible cigarrettes never hurt you again.  You are doing Great Soul and Spirit work.

Warm regards,

Jane

Hey, I'll take whatever I can get, and say thank you.  I have now passed the five day mark, which is a record for me.  I attribute some of it to having proper medication for anxiety and panic, which I didn't have during past attempts; part of it to a choice to quit very gradually over several months; part of it to single-minded determination NEVER to have to do this again; and part to the generous support of my friends.  One of my cats, Lucie, has motivated me simply by looking at me whenever she has seen me with a cigarette, as if to say, "Oh, UGH!!  You SMOKE!!"  She is very pleased with the change.

I certainly know you can keep giving it up - smoking.  Generations in my family are healthy but die because of smoking.  When I met my husband he was smoking 3 packs a day but was truely not addicted.  He quit within a month or so.  Even now 45 years later, he will about once a year 'want' a cigarette.  None of my sons smoke - thank heavens.  However, one chews and he has tired to quit many times.  My brother has quit upto 6 months and returned.  I know he would like to but just can't.  I think there is some sort of genetic link in our family that addiction, only to tobacco it appears, is strong.  I never did start and was the only one.  So true blessings and don't give up; it is very hard.  But what are the other choices??  When the initial withdrawal is complete (about 7 days), you should start dreaming again.  I will try to have a dream that sees you NOT smoking or wanting to; who knows it could help.