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Date Created:
March 22, 2008
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AARP.org
Knitting
A place to share ideas, projects,and questions
  Post to Topic     Print   Off Topic, but Humorous: New Diet?
http://www.aarp.org/community/groups/displayTopic.bt?groupId=1252&topicId=3095882
runorknit said:
on July 29, 2009 11:35 AM ET

This posted on a thread at www.knittinghelp.com and I had to share:

"Yesterday I was buying 2 large bags of Purina dog chow at Wal-Mart for my dogs, Cricket and Sugarfoot. I was about to check out when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog. Did she think that I had an elephant?
Since I had little else to do, on impulse, I said, “No, I don’t have a dog, but I am starting the Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn’t because I ended up in the hospital last time. On the bright side though, I’d lost 50 pounds before I woke up in the Commerce hospital with tubes coming out of every orifice in my body and intravenous tubes in both arms."
 
I went on with my story saying, “Purina Dog Chow is essentially a perfect diet. The way it works is to load your pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. It’s nutritionally complete so I am going to try it again.”
 
I must mention here that practically everyone in the line was enthralled with my story by now."
 
Horrified, the woman asked if I ended up in the hospital because the dog food had poisoned me. I said, “No, I stopped in the middle of the parking lot to lick my butt, and a car hit me.”
I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack, he was laughing so hard!"
 
The WAL-MART store here in Commerce won’t let me shop there anymore."

Happy Wednesday!
3 posts by 3 users
kaycee1026
Post #3
kaycee1026 said:
on August 10, 2009 03:25 PM ET

 I Love your story.  Thanks for the chuckle in my day.  I wish I had thought to do that when I was getting dog food for my friends big dogs.   Kathy


purpleiris777
Post #2
purpleiris777 said:
on July 30, 2009 10:38 AM ET

 

THAT IS HILARIOUS!  THANKS FOR THE CHUCKLE.  WILL ALSO C HECK OUT THE SITE!


clairedene
Post #1
clairedene said:
on July 29, 2009 05:33 PM ET

Thanks for the hysterical joke!  I am always hoping someone will post on this site, so this is a good start.

Also, thanks for the link to www.knittinghelp.com -- I have already found some great patterns on the site.

Claire 

P.S.  I wish you shopped at my Wal-Mart.