ENGLEWOOD, Florida
United States
"How far that little candle throws his beams! So shines a good deed in a weary world." --William Shakespeare
Ask the Experts: Social SecuriWhen "WE" became "ME"..
I was somebody. I had a business, a home, a life I loved, and a fun and kind best friend to love. Then, Pat died.
I was so unprepared. We had know the day would come. Pat had AML [acute myelogenous leukemia] and the odds are against you. I thought I was prepared. I knew what I was facing...NOT!
During Pat's illness, we had to divest ourselves of our beloved dogs and birds. They were our 'here' children. Mike and Molly, our human children lived on their own.
When I left the hospital that final day, after doing all the right things, I found myself alone for the first time. No one to talk to. No dogs to walk or care for. No one to do for. I didn't know how to make me #1.
The journey from that December day in 2004 has been long, lonely, challenging, frightning, rewarding [finally] and most of all ongoing.
Maybe I need into words the myriad of feelings that have made this impossible remake, possible.
My husband just passed away from AML.
The reality of being alone is hitting hard now that the relatives are gone and the memorial service is over. So much paperwork to take care of and I've never done anything like this before.
Today is the first day I've had which has been a struggle, and many tears have come. The ache is so bad. I have a couple of books on grieving that were given to me by other recent widows, and somehow it helps to know what they are going through too.
But I miss Keith so much...he was such a trooper in the hospital; he was my sole focus for the last year, now that focus is gone. This is going to be much harder than I had thought.
My heart goes out to you, Just by reading the stories of your loss helps me to try to get some things in order. You can't take life for granted and we must realize the death is part of life. I'm not sure if we can ever be ready for that day. I thank you for your truth and pray that I can be more prepared for it. God bless you.......Helen (Louisiana)
Two years ago today my Nick passed away after a year with multiple health problems. It is still very hard to bear - loneliness being the worst. I still have my dogs and cat - don't know what I would do without them and a daughter who has been so caring. I know how you must have felt and can only hope things will be better in time. Irene Ferrant (Corrida)
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