Have you ever been talking with someone and their cel phone rings?  This happens to me all the time.  When that phone rings the conversation is over between us and the mad scramble is on to get to that talk button.  I am no longer in their world, that cel phone has made me invisible.  They get the thing out of their pocket, purse or one of those little holders on their belt and look at it to see who is calling.  Why do they look?  It does not matter, they are going to answer. 

     This really irritates me.  Is everyone that calls them more important than the person standing in front of them?  It makes me feel like I was only being tolerated until their phone rang and gave them an excuse to get away.  Am I that dull and uninteresting that everybody comes ahead of me?  I guess so because that cel phone is aways number one.  It's even more insulting when the caller is a text message that just can't wait.

     I'm not anti cel phone, I have one that I use every day in my business.  It's a great tool that frankly would be hard to be without but it's not first in my life.  I make a special effort to not answer the phone when I am talking with someone.  If it rings I just push that little button on the side that makes it be quite.  I'll call back later when I am finished with the important, interesting person in front of me.

     I have a little red sports car.  1994 Mazda Miata.  I got it for my 60th birthday, a gift to myself.  It’s not my first, long time ago I had a MGB. What a fun car that was for a single 23 year old who had just been let loose from the Air Force.  Memory of that MG is part of the reason I got the Miata.  It started something in me that has never died, riding with the top down. What could be more fun?

     It makes me happy and my grandson loves it.  Riding along with the sun on me, the wind blowing all around and the Jimmy Buffett music turned up loud so you can here it over the wind makes me smile.

     I’ve noticed this spring that it invites comments and short conversations from people on the road.  People that would normally never even look at me roll down their windows and want to talk.  I’ve been getting a lot of, "Nice car", "That looks like fun", "Beautiful day", "Wish I had one of those" and "Great day to put the top down".  I turn the radio down a bit, smile and answer.  It seems to make them happy to see me happy.  Is happy contagious?  I’m beginning to think so.  I know it is not permanent but they do drive off with a smile.  Maybe they take it home with them.  I hope so.

     Maybe all cars should be able to put the top down.  Then we all could sit at red lights and talk to each other and smile.  Works for me.

     I hate cutting the grass.  I know it looks better when it's done and it keeps the neighbors from reporting me to the city but I still hate pushing that lawn mower.  Such a mindless task.  Just push push walk walk.......ugh!

     Today was a little different.  While walking and pushing I began to notice what a wonderful day it was.  Sun shining, temperature in the low 70's, birds singing, flowers blooming and the smell of fresh cut grass.  I began to think how the spring made me feel more spiritual and more in touch with a higher power.  I can see God in everything my eyes look at and I can feel God on my skin in the form of a soft warm breeze.  I'm not a religious person but I do believe in a higher power or God if you will.  I believe in prayer as a form of meditation and a way to speak to God.  I think I should speak with God more than I do, it seems to make me a better person.

     God did all the talking today.  All I had to do was soak it all in.  Normally God speaks to me from behind and into my right ear but today the voice came from everywhere.  I could see that voice and feel that presence.  It said, here is a gift for you to enjoy.  So thank you higher power, it was a two thumbs up day.  My soul is refreshed.

     I still hate pushing that mower but today was not as bad.

Butch - 05/01/08

     For the most part I was quite happy with my life.  Good job, great wife.  Just the two of us to do what we pleased, when we pleased.  No one to take care of anymore but ourselves.  Retirement from one career knocking on the door and looking forward to starting a new business in the near future. 

     Never wanted to raise my grandchildren.  I was happy to just have them over for a visit and take them home when I grew tried of playing.  A normal grandparent who has fun spoiling his grand kids.  Then a funny thing happened............

ALONG CAME ZAC

     He was only a few months old when we got him.  He came by way of a phone call from the local police.  Mom and Dad were going back to jail and he had nowhere to go.  That was four years ago.

     A lot has happened in those four years.  Mom and Dad got out of jail but were unable to care for him.  They see him sometimes for short visits but for the most part they are missing his whole life.  They have other things in their lives that are more important.

     The biggest event that occurred was truly unbelievable.  This little guy reached inside me and grabbed my heart and he won’t let go.  I love him so much that sometimes it makes water fall out of my eyes.  I would never cry but water does fall from my eyes. Mostly the left one, must be a problem with it.  A relationship so simple that it has to be God inspired, I love him and he loves me.  No conditions or trust issues to deal with, just an unbreakable bond.  I let him do everything that I do.  He always wants to help and I always let him.  Unlike my own two sons that I wrongly thought were in my way when I was working around the house, Zac is never in the way.  I hammer he hammers, I paint he paints, I wash the car he squirts me with the water hose. We laugh.  

     Oh how he has opened my eyes.  I am ashamed that I missed so many wonderful things with my sons because I was young and dumb.  I am elated that I have been given another chance.  More water falls from my left eye when I think of both things.  Damn this eye!

     Zac has changed my life in such a pleasant way.  My hope for us is that he continues to teach me.

     The reason this is in red?  His favorite color.

Butch - 04/30/08